83: Healing the Loneliness Epidemic: Building Trauma-Informed Community and Connection

In this insightful episode, host Kara Lovehart, Mind-Body Medium, executive intuitive coach, and founder of Firefly Hollow Wellness, takes a deep dive into the roots and impacts of the loneliness epidemic. Starting with an exploration of its history and alarming statistics—like how loneliness is now linked to health risks comparable to smoking—Kara examines the social, cultural, and technological shifts contributing to rising isolation. She shares the transformative power of community for healing, focusing on the limbic system’s need for connection and the health benefits of supportive social networks.

Firefly Hollow’s commitment to trauma-informed, safe spaces for genuine connection is highlighted, detailing roles we can play in a community—from the Connector to the Innovator—that support a balanced, vibrant group dynamic. Kara wraps up with practical tips for overcoming the barriers to joining new communities, especially for those carrying past hurts, emphasizing Firefly Hollow as a sanctuary for growth, belonging, and authentic healing.

Key Points:

• The Loneliness Epidemic: Alarming trends in social isolation and health impacts.
• Root Causes of Isolation: Cultural shifts, individualism, and social media effects.
• Healing Through Community: How belonging reduces stress and boosts mental health.
• Trauma-Informed Spaces: Firefly Hollow’s pillars of safety, transparency, and empowerment.
• Healthy Community Roles: Discover the roles you naturally embody, from Listener to Innovator.
• Overcoming Barriers: Steps to ease into new groups and find belonging.

This episode is packed with wisdom for anyone seeking community and deeper human connection, reminding listeners that everyone has a role to play in building a thriving, healing community. Join Kara for insights, inspiration, and an invitation to experience a safe, supportive space at Firefly Hollow.

Transcript

Healing the Loneliness Epidemic with Mind-Body Medium Kara Lovehart

In episode 83 of the Mind Body Detox Podcast, Mind-Body Psychic Medium and Executive Intuitive Coach Kara Lovehart explores the loneliness epidemic and how building supportive, trauma-informed communities can be a path to healing. Kara dives into the statistics behind rising loneliness and the cultural shifts that drive social isolation, from technology dependence to a focus on individualism. She explains how community connection benefits our mental and physical health, reduces stress, and promotes well-being through our brain’s limbic system.

Kara also shares Firefly Hollow’s commitment to creating safe, inclusive spaces for authentic connection, where everyone can find a role—whether as a Connector, Motivator, Listener, or Innovator. For anyone seeking true connection, this episode reveals how Firefly Hollow Wellness Center is dedicated to helping individuals build the relationships we all need to thrive.

 
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 This is the MindBodyDetox podcast,
 
 00:00:07.134 --> 00:00:09.035
 where we discuss all things
 
 00:00:09.195 --> 00:00:11.016
 integrative health and wellness,
 
 00:00:11.455 --> 00:00:12.776
 interviewing folks from all
 
 00:00:12.836 --> 00:00:13.598
 over the world,
 
 00:00:14.057 --> 00:00:16.178
 sharing insights and wisdom
 
 00:00:16.519 --> 00:00:19.201
 on how to live a healthier life in mind,
 
 00:00:19.420 --> 00:00:20.961
 body, and spirit.
 
 00:00:45.908 --> 00:00:47.048
 welcome back everyone to the
 
 00:00:47.067 --> 00:00:48.988
 mind body detox podcast I'm
 
 00:00:49.029 --> 00:00:50.429
 your host mind body medium
 
 00:00:50.469 --> 00:00:52.049
 Kara Lovehart and I wanted
 
 00:00:52.090 --> 00:00:53.570
 to talk about healing the
 
 00:00:53.651 --> 00:00:55.591
 epidemic of loneliness so
 
 00:00:55.710 --> 00:00:57.252
 this is a topic that since
 
 00:00:57.311 --> 00:00:59.533
 I've opened a clinic in I
 
 00:01:00.393 --> 00:01:01.793
 already started watching
 
 00:01:01.853 --> 00:01:03.433
 this interesting dynamic we
 
 00:01:03.454 --> 00:01:04.855
 started having in our
 
 00:01:04.875 --> 00:01:06.614
 community with just having
 
 00:01:06.655 --> 00:01:07.555
 this challenge with
 
 00:01:07.575 --> 00:01:08.575
 bringing people together
 
 00:01:09.256 --> 00:01:09.996
 And of course,
 
 00:01:10.057 --> 00:01:11.016
 if you are living in our
 
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 world and not living in Iraq,
 
 00:01:13.478 --> 00:01:15.180
 if you're not living in Iraq these days,
 
 00:01:15.560 --> 00:01:16.141
 you, of course,
 
 00:01:16.180 --> 00:01:17.802
 can see the increase in
 
 00:01:17.841 --> 00:01:19.543
 polarization and separation
 
 00:01:19.683 --> 00:01:21.664
 and loneliness and even
 
 00:01:21.703 --> 00:01:23.465
 just moving to a new city or town,
 
 00:01:23.766 --> 00:01:25.766
 having a hard time finding friends,
 
 00:01:26.206 --> 00:01:27.727
 making new groups.
 
 00:01:28.028 --> 00:01:29.088
 And even if you haven't
 
 00:01:29.129 --> 00:01:30.510
 moved somewhere or you're
 
 00:01:30.530 --> 00:01:31.771
 changing your lifestyle,
 
 00:01:31.911 --> 00:01:33.852
 if you've had big lifestyle
 
 00:01:33.891 --> 00:01:36.353
 changes over the last few years or
 
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 And you've changed who you are,
 
 00:01:38.915 --> 00:01:40.277
 what type of things you value.
 
 00:01:41.057 --> 00:01:42.337
 Most likely your community,
 
 00:01:42.477 --> 00:01:43.218
 your friend group,
 
 00:01:43.239 --> 00:01:44.218
 your organization you're
 
 00:01:44.239 --> 00:01:45.280
 even maybe working for.
 
 00:01:45.599 --> 00:01:46.861
 Those things can change.
 
 00:01:47.240 --> 00:01:49.983
 And so anchoring yourself into a new space,
 
 00:01:50.043 --> 00:01:50.783
 especially in...
 
 00:01:51.664 --> 00:01:53.144
 the age of polarization,
 
 00:01:53.165 --> 00:01:53.984
 let's call it that,
 
 00:01:54.424 --> 00:01:55.566
 that we're living in can be
 
 00:01:55.605 --> 00:01:56.426
 really challenging.
 
 00:01:57.087 --> 00:01:58.947
 So I really want to share
 
 00:01:58.986 --> 00:02:00.408
 today a little bit more
 
 00:02:00.528 --> 00:02:02.429
 about the epidemic of loneliness,
 
 00:02:02.448 --> 00:02:03.388
 some of the statistics,
 
 00:02:04.090 --> 00:02:05.310
 some of the cool things
 
 00:02:05.370 --> 00:02:07.350
 that we might not know about community,
 
 00:02:07.391 --> 00:02:08.771
 about successful communities.
 
 00:02:09.252 --> 00:02:11.612
 maybe even roles that you could play,
 
 00:02:11.733 --> 00:02:12.873
 or maybe you already do play,
 
 00:02:12.894 --> 00:02:14.294
 you just don't have labels for them.
 
 00:02:14.655 --> 00:02:16.436
 When you engage in an interaction,
 
 00:02:16.475 --> 00:02:18.097
 whether it's just with your friend group,
 
 00:02:18.456 --> 00:02:19.818
 it's in a community organization,
 
 00:02:19.877 --> 00:02:21.538
 or even at your workplace.
 
 00:02:21.878 --> 00:02:22.759
 So these are pretty cool
 
 00:02:22.780 --> 00:02:23.599
 things because if we have
 
 00:02:23.680 --> 00:02:25.942
 language to talk about community,
 
 00:02:26.342 --> 00:02:27.682
 we can have language to
 
 00:02:28.203 --> 00:02:29.622
 make associations between
 
 00:02:29.703 --> 00:02:30.883
 what might be a red flag
 
 00:02:30.903 --> 00:02:32.764
 for us and go into a space
 
 00:02:32.864 --> 00:02:34.125
 and what might be green flags.
 
 00:02:34.485 --> 00:02:35.745
 And this can help us to
 
 00:02:35.844 --> 00:02:38.306
 create opportunities that
 
 00:02:38.485 --> 00:02:40.145
 we can discern where are
 
 00:02:40.186 --> 00:02:41.706
 safe spaces for us to anchor?
 
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 Where are the places that we
 
 00:02:42.947 --> 00:02:44.127
 might be welcome that are
 
 00:02:44.146 --> 00:02:45.728
 in alignment with our values?
 
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 And then, of course,
 
 00:02:46.848 --> 00:02:48.068
 that's where the magic
 
 00:02:48.108 --> 00:02:49.889
 happens when we have these
 
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 standards for what we're
 
 00:02:51.629 --> 00:02:52.810
 looking for and then we go
 
 00:02:52.909 --> 00:02:54.631
 into a space and we can
 
 00:02:54.670 --> 00:02:55.632
 create this sense of
 
 00:02:55.671 --> 00:02:57.592
 belonging that a lot of us
 
 00:02:57.853 --> 00:02:59.354
 really are longing for and
 
 00:02:59.774 --> 00:03:01.414
 as human beings we need.
 
 00:03:01.854 --> 00:03:03.295
 So first off,
 
 00:03:03.415 --> 00:03:06.516
 if you have created space for
 
 00:03:06.537 --> 00:03:08.358
 yourself in a community, let me know.
 
 00:03:08.478 --> 00:03:09.558
 I want to know more about that.
 
 00:03:09.899 --> 00:03:11.199
 Hit me up, message me,
 
 00:03:11.240 --> 00:03:12.240
 send us an email here.
 
 00:03:12.980 --> 00:03:14.001
 And let's start with this
 
 00:03:14.040 --> 00:03:15.102
 question here in general.
 
 00:03:15.901 --> 00:03:16.901
 I want to know what's one
 
 00:03:16.921 --> 00:03:18.383
 thing that you have looked
 
 00:03:18.402 --> 00:03:19.782
 for in a community or you
 
 00:03:19.802 --> 00:03:20.462
 look for when you're
 
 00:03:20.483 --> 00:03:22.084
 looking to make new friends.
 
 00:03:22.644 --> 00:03:24.284
 So you can share that in the chat.
 
 00:03:25.104 --> 00:03:25.985
 I'm going to share a little
 
 00:03:26.004 --> 00:03:26.965
 bit about what we've got
 
 00:03:26.985 --> 00:03:28.126
 from our Conscious Curious
 
 00:03:28.165 --> 00:03:29.045
 Explorers Club.
 
 00:03:29.346 --> 00:03:29.966
 So that's a club,
 
 00:03:30.006 --> 00:03:30.907
 an organization that we
 
 00:03:30.947 --> 00:03:32.747
 have at my clinic here in York, PA,
 
 00:03:32.826 --> 00:03:34.087
 Firefly Hollow Wellness Center.
 
 00:03:34.608 --> 00:03:35.867
 And it is a group of people
 
 00:03:35.888 --> 00:03:36.848
 that want to get together
 
 00:03:36.949 --> 00:03:39.209
 and just explore holistic wellness topics,
 
 00:03:39.609 --> 00:03:41.310
 self-improvement, empowerment,
 
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 in a safe space,
 
 00:03:42.871 --> 00:03:43.891
 in a safe container where
 
 00:03:43.912 --> 00:03:44.953
 they don't feel judged,
 
 00:03:45.574 --> 00:03:46.594
 where they can be open with
 
 00:03:46.775 --> 00:03:48.276
 questioning and curiosity,
 
 00:03:48.676 --> 00:03:49.777
 and then just really feel
 
 00:03:49.818 --> 00:03:51.179
 supported along their journey.
 
 00:03:51.699 --> 00:03:53.622
 So when we asked our group,
 
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 what type of things do you
 
 00:03:55.783 --> 00:03:59.347
 look for in a community, in a safe space?
 
 00:03:59.586 --> 00:04:00.367
 This is what we got.
 
 00:04:01.408 --> 00:04:03.129
 look for openness safety
 
 00:04:03.490 --> 00:04:05.350
 listening really listening
 
 00:04:05.531 --> 00:04:07.792
 authentic listening clarity
 
 00:04:07.931 --> 00:04:09.652
 love and permission to be
 
 00:04:09.733 --> 00:04:12.873
 authentic honesty and
 
 00:04:13.533 --> 00:04:14.354
 generally a place where
 
 00:04:14.395 --> 00:04:15.594
 people are of service want
 
 00:04:15.615 --> 00:04:18.036
 to be of service other
 
 00:04:18.055 --> 00:04:19.036
 things we found are
 
 00:04:19.096 --> 00:04:20.576
 friendship and acceptance
 
 00:04:20.956 --> 00:04:22.658
 people to explore with that
 
 00:04:22.677 --> 00:04:24.819
 are open and curious not closed-minded
 
 00:04:25.882 --> 00:04:28.545
 People who are able to take a joke,
 
 00:04:28.846 --> 00:04:30.028
 having a sense of humor,
 
 00:04:30.428 --> 00:04:31.269
 that's really important in
 
 00:04:31.290 --> 00:04:32.031
 this day and age,
 
 00:04:32.651 --> 00:04:34.055
 and especially without judgment.
 
 00:04:35.639 --> 00:04:36.620
 The other one is looking for
 
 00:04:36.680 --> 00:04:38.161
 inspiration and initiation.
 
 00:04:38.221 --> 00:04:38.802
 Sometimes we need
 
 00:04:38.843 --> 00:04:40.803
 accountability when we're creating space,
 
 00:04:41.204 --> 00:04:42.665
 whether we're joining a
 
 00:04:43.045 --> 00:04:44.047
 organization or maybe we're
 
 00:04:44.286 --> 00:04:45.127
 going to a gym,
 
 00:04:45.146 --> 00:04:46.728
 we might need an accountability buddy,
 
 00:04:46.908 --> 00:04:47.689
 or we're looking to make
 
 00:04:47.728 --> 00:04:49.190
 any sort of improvements in our lives.
 
 00:04:49.531 --> 00:04:51.572
 That connection with others
 
 00:04:51.632 --> 00:04:53.673
 that can help us to motivate ourselves,
 
 00:04:53.733 --> 00:04:54.875
 encourage us to stay on
 
 00:04:54.894 --> 00:04:56.315
 that path is really important.
 
 00:04:56.615 --> 00:04:57.497
 And so we saw that in our
 
 00:04:57.536 --> 00:04:58.237
 community as well.
 
 00:04:59.706 --> 00:05:02.290
 looking for safe space so
 
 00:05:02.430 --> 00:05:03.351
 we'll define what that
 
 00:05:03.492 --> 00:05:04.853
 might mean and that could
 
 00:05:04.874 --> 00:05:05.855
 be different depending on
 
 00:05:05.875 --> 00:05:07.137
 who you are what a safer
 
 00:05:07.197 --> 00:05:09.660
 space looks like trust fun
 
 00:05:09.699 --> 00:05:12.122
 and play accountability and
 
 00:05:12.144 --> 00:05:14.365
 an initiator someone who initiates things
 
 00:05:14.867 --> 00:05:15.848
 Because we'll see when we
 
 00:05:15.887 --> 00:05:17.069
 talk about in this episode
 
 00:05:17.348 --> 00:05:18.410
 that each of us hold
 
 00:05:18.470 --> 00:05:20.252
 different perspectives and
 
 00:05:20.312 --> 00:05:22.093
 characteristics in our personalities.
 
 00:05:22.514 --> 00:05:23.915
 So we may not always be that
 
 00:05:23.975 --> 00:05:25.295
 person that would initiate
 
 00:05:25.355 --> 00:05:27.257
 or go out and be the
 
 00:05:27.298 --> 00:05:29.038
 adventurer to find things to do.
 
 00:05:29.360 --> 00:05:30.540
 We may be the person that
 
 00:05:30.560 --> 00:05:31.781
 likes to come along for the
 
 00:05:31.822 --> 00:05:32.843
 journey and for the ride.
 
 00:05:33.322 --> 00:05:34.024
 And we might not be the
 
 00:05:34.064 --> 00:05:34.624
 person that's the
 
 00:05:34.704 --> 00:05:36.245
 icebreaker or the person that...
 
 00:05:37.026 --> 00:05:38.307
 ends up speaking to strangers.
 
 00:05:38.367 --> 00:05:39.507
 We may need someone in our
 
 00:05:39.547 --> 00:05:41.108
 lives that does that for us.
 
 00:05:41.488 --> 00:05:42.468
 So there are different roles
 
 00:05:42.509 --> 00:05:43.629
 that we have in community.
 
 00:05:43.970 --> 00:05:45.711
 And if you're lacking those roles,
 
 00:05:45.831 --> 00:05:47.471
 maybe in a space you have now,
 
 00:05:48.012 --> 00:05:49.093
 or if there's a dominance
 
 00:05:49.132 --> 00:05:50.293
 of certain types of roles,
 
 00:05:50.934 --> 00:05:51.814
 we'll talk about that,
 
 00:05:52.055 --> 00:05:53.035
 and you don't have other ones,
 
 00:05:53.134 --> 00:05:54.576
 it can create this imbalance.
 
 00:05:54.795 --> 00:05:56.076
 And then, of course, over time,
 
 00:05:56.117 --> 00:05:58.757
 that creates just upheavals in community.
 
 00:05:58.817 --> 00:05:59.939
 And it doesn't create this
 
 00:06:00.019 --> 00:06:02.220
 cohesiveness and this
 
 00:06:03.161 --> 00:06:04.401
 harmony that you want to look for.
 
 00:06:05.622 --> 00:06:06.822
 There's other things that
 
 00:06:06.843 --> 00:06:07.642
 the community we're looking
 
 00:06:07.663 --> 00:06:10.084
 for is acceptance, connection with others,
 
 00:06:10.904 --> 00:06:12.165
 alternate thoughts, ideas,
 
 00:06:12.185 --> 00:06:14.086
 and conversations, open-mindedness,
 
 00:06:14.427 --> 00:06:16.507
 connections, friendship, and expansion.
 
 00:06:17.028 --> 00:06:18.548
 So if you summarize all these,
 
 00:06:18.970 --> 00:06:20.290
 really a lot of the people
 
 00:06:20.310 --> 00:06:21.411
 that we're working with are
 
 00:06:21.471 --> 00:06:23.211
 looking to create connection,
 
 00:06:23.252 --> 00:06:24.992
 like true authentic connection.
 
 00:06:25.372 --> 00:06:27.233
 Those words came up multiple times,
 
 00:06:27.713 --> 00:06:29.235
 openness and curiosity.
 
 00:06:29.735 --> 00:06:31.156
 And I think that when you're
 
 00:06:31.415 --> 00:06:33.497
 in a space where you feel accepted,
 
 00:06:34.237 --> 00:06:35.538
 where people can see you for
 
 00:06:35.577 --> 00:06:36.519
 who you are and you can
 
 00:06:36.579 --> 00:06:38.559
 show up for who you are authentically,
 
 00:06:39.338 --> 00:06:40.798
 those I feel are the
 
 00:06:40.879 --> 00:06:43.360
 foundational needs that we
 
 00:06:43.399 --> 00:06:44.519
 all need as human beings.
 
 00:06:44.839 --> 00:06:46.540
 And we can add them into a container,
 
 00:06:46.560 --> 00:06:47.740
 whether it's our workplace,
 
 00:06:48.081 --> 00:06:49.942
 whether it's our community group,
 
 00:06:49.961 --> 00:06:50.521
 our church,
 
 00:06:50.581 --> 00:06:52.182
 wherever we are frequently and
 
 00:06:52.201 --> 00:06:53.422
 to create that connection
 
 00:06:53.442 --> 00:06:56.442
 and seeking belonging within human tribe,
 
 00:06:56.783 --> 00:06:58.142
 those things are foundational.
 
 00:06:58.483 --> 00:06:59.264
 So let's talk a little bit
 
 00:06:59.283 --> 00:07:00.783
 about the epidemic of loneliness.
 
 00:07:01.331 --> 00:07:03.213
 OK, so in general,
 
 00:07:03.312 --> 00:07:05.093
 nearly half of the US adults,
 
 00:07:05.454 --> 00:07:07.196
 forty seven percent are
 
 00:07:07.255 --> 00:07:08.076
 reporting feeling
 
 00:07:08.137 --> 00:07:10.338
 loneliness in twenty twenty three.
 
 00:07:10.439 --> 00:07:11.579
 So there's a study of thirty
 
 00:07:11.660 --> 00:07:13.221
 six percent of all Americans,
 
 00:07:13.581 --> 00:07:15.062
 including sixty one percent.
 
 00:07:15.081 --> 00:07:15.562
 That's a lot.
 
 00:07:15.682 --> 00:07:17.904
 Sixty one percent are young adults.
 
 00:07:18.345 --> 00:07:18.444
 Now,
 
 00:07:18.485 --> 00:07:20.107
 this is a different age we're living in.
 
 00:07:20.146 --> 00:07:22.327
 If you're someone that
 
 00:07:23.435 --> 00:07:25.497
 knows what dial-up internet
 
 00:07:25.516 --> 00:07:26.776
 it was you would not
 
 00:07:26.797 --> 00:07:27.757
 necessarily be in this age
 
 00:07:27.776 --> 00:07:29.557
 group but it's something
 
 00:07:29.598 --> 00:07:30.658
 that our younger
 
 00:07:30.737 --> 00:07:32.298
 generations have so much
 
 00:07:32.559 --> 00:07:34.139
 disconnection from face to
 
 00:07:34.199 --> 00:07:35.658
 face they're of course on
 
 00:07:35.678 --> 00:07:37.300
 their devices just like I
 
 00:07:37.319 --> 00:07:38.319
 am right now speaking to
 
 00:07:38.360 --> 00:07:39.880
 you from this remote
 
 00:07:39.901 --> 00:07:41.380
 computer in some location
 
 00:07:41.461 --> 00:07:43.601
 my my my information is
 
 00:07:43.762 --> 00:07:44.882
 being sent through bits
 
 00:07:45.401 --> 00:07:46.963
 in the sky to your computer,
 
 00:07:46.983 --> 00:07:48.184
 your device like magic.
 
 00:07:48.524 --> 00:07:49.125
 And then, of course,
 
 00:07:49.384 --> 00:07:50.305
 we're talking to each other
 
 00:07:50.326 --> 00:07:50.987
 or you're seeing me or
 
 00:07:51.007 --> 00:07:51.846
 chatting in the chat.
 
 00:07:52.187 --> 00:07:55.029
 But that is basically not
 
 00:07:55.069 --> 00:07:56.872
 the same type of thing we need.
 
 00:07:56.932 --> 00:07:59.634
 And even the animal brains that we have,
 
 00:07:59.673 --> 00:08:00.834
 we have this limbic system,
 
 00:08:00.875 --> 00:08:02.115
 this mammalian brain that
 
 00:08:02.196 --> 00:08:03.216
 seeks connection.
 
 00:08:03.737 --> 00:08:04.898
 And we don't have that.
 
 00:08:05.137 --> 00:08:07.079
 It doesn't matter how smart we are,
 
 00:08:07.339 --> 00:08:09.262
 how much we have done.
 
 00:08:09.742 --> 00:08:11.262
 maybe self-regulation
 
 00:08:11.302 --> 00:08:13.245
 techniques for stress and
 
 00:08:13.504 --> 00:08:14.386
 helping ourselves try to
 
 00:08:14.425 --> 00:08:15.747
 feel safe with breathwork
 
 00:08:15.766 --> 00:08:17.709
 or yoga or journaling, whatever you do,
 
 00:08:18.449 --> 00:08:19.951
 you are a primal being that
 
 00:08:19.990 --> 00:08:21.632
 has parts of your brain
 
 00:08:22.173 --> 00:08:24.535
 that will automatically keep you alive.
 
 00:08:24.894 --> 00:08:26.096
 And one of these parts of
 
 00:08:26.136 --> 00:08:28.278
 our survival is the mammalian brain,
 
 00:08:28.298 --> 00:08:29.899
 the emotional brain that we
 
 00:08:29.939 --> 00:08:31.120
 create this connection.
 
 00:08:31.480 --> 00:08:32.402
 And when we feel that we're
 
 00:08:32.422 --> 00:08:34.202
 part of a group and we feel we belong,
 
 00:08:34.783 --> 00:08:35.825
 our nervous system will
 
 00:08:36.004 --> 00:08:37.986
 automatically start to feel safe.
 
 00:08:38.606 --> 00:08:39.567
 And this is something we can
 
 00:08:40.009 --> 00:08:42.091
 override with a lot of personal work.
 
 00:08:42.110 --> 00:08:42.511
 But again,
 
 00:08:42.552 --> 00:08:44.153
 a lot of this is still unconscious.
 
 00:08:44.653 --> 00:08:45.575
 And it's just there in our
 
 00:08:45.655 --> 00:08:47.618
 operating system to help keep us safe.
 
 00:08:47.977 --> 00:08:49.980
 If we're in groups as mammals,
 
 00:08:50.181 --> 00:08:51.101
 we can be safer,
 
 00:08:51.182 --> 00:08:52.744
 especially when it comes to survival.
 
 00:08:53.205 --> 00:08:55.226
 And this is one thing that
 
 00:08:55.326 --> 00:08:57.128
 biggest thing that I try to tell people,
 
 00:08:57.187 --> 00:08:57.989
 if you're on a healing
 
 00:08:58.028 --> 00:08:59.448
 journey and you're maybe in
 
 00:08:59.509 --> 00:09:00.649
 hermit mode with your journey,
 
 00:09:00.690 --> 00:09:02.051
 which many times we have to
 
 00:09:02.110 --> 00:09:03.951
 go in that stage of trying
 
 00:09:03.971 --> 00:09:05.373
 to find ourselves or
 
 00:09:05.413 --> 00:09:06.413
 whatever it is we're looking,
 
 00:09:06.432 --> 00:09:07.573
 we're seeking guidance,
 
 00:09:07.594 --> 00:09:08.495
 maybe with one or two
 
 00:09:08.955 --> 00:09:10.115
 others or professionals.
 
 00:09:10.716 --> 00:09:11.676
 Along that journey,
 
 00:09:11.836 --> 00:09:13.136
 we do need to sometimes
 
 00:09:13.618 --> 00:09:15.178
 recognize that we can only
 
 00:09:15.219 --> 00:09:16.698
 do so much healing before
 
 00:09:16.759 --> 00:09:17.720
 our primal brains,
 
 00:09:17.799 --> 00:09:19.181
 our nervous system needs a
 
 00:09:19.221 --> 00:09:21.761
 connection to really feel, wow,
 
 00:09:21.841 --> 00:09:22.462
 I am safe.
 
 00:09:22.543 --> 00:09:23.263
 I belong.
 
 00:09:23.623 --> 00:09:24.624
 That can really help.
 
 00:09:25.024 --> 00:09:26.404
 anxious thinking and these
 
 00:09:26.445 --> 00:09:27.225
 ruminating types of
 
 00:09:27.566 --> 00:09:29.086
 thoughts and just support
 
 00:09:29.106 --> 00:09:30.086
 our mental well-being.
 
 00:09:30.427 --> 00:09:31.048
 Now, of course,
 
 00:09:31.128 --> 00:09:32.708
 I'm going to just make a disclaimer here.
 
 00:09:32.788 --> 00:09:33.490
 I am not a doctor.
 
 00:09:33.509 --> 00:09:34.190
 I'm not a therapist.
 
 00:09:34.210 --> 00:09:35.250
 I'm not here giving any
 
 00:09:35.311 --> 00:09:37.432
 advice for medical advice
 
 00:09:37.451 --> 00:09:38.253
 or mental health advice,
 
 00:09:38.273 --> 00:09:39.352
 but I'm here to educate you
 
 00:09:39.413 --> 00:09:40.433
 about some of the ways that
 
 00:09:40.453 --> 00:09:41.955
 we operate as humans and
 
 00:09:41.975 --> 00:09:42.855
 this epidemic and the
 
 00:09:42.895 --> 00:09:44.557
 statistics we're seeing with loneliness.
 
 00:09:45.600 --> 00:09:46.581
 So loneliness,
 
 00:09:46.600 --> 00:09:48.322
 it actually can be called an
 
 00:09:48.363 --> 00:09:49.443
 epidemic and it's
 
 00:09:49.484 --> 00:09:50.605
 comparable to the effects
 
 00:09:50.806 --> 00:09:51.807
 of smoking fifteen
 
 00:09:51.846 --> 00:09:53.869
 cigarettes a day in its health risks.
 
 00:09:54.450 --> 00:09:56.471
 So think about that, of course, for like,
 
 00:09:56.532 --> 00:09:58.734
 well, all right, but how lonely am I?
 
 00:09:58.793 --> 00:09:58.975
 Right.
 
 00:09:59.274 --> 00:10:00.817
 How often are you making
 
 00:10:00.856 --> 00:10:02.018
 face to face contact with
 
 00:10:02.057 --> 00:10:04.461
 people and how often is it feeling
 
 00:10:04.941 --> 00:10:05.581
 Satisfying.
 
 00:10:05.600 --> 00:10:06.461
 Are you feeling satisfied
 
 00:10:06.480 --> 00:10:07.361
 with that contact?
 
 00:10:07.822 --> 00:10:09.682
 Because some people are more introverted,
 
 00:10:09.761 --> 00:10:09.942
 right?
 
 00:10:10.003 --> 00:10:10.702
 If you're someone that's a
 
 00:10:10.763 --> 00:10:12.202
 highly sensitive nervous system,
 
 00:10:12.302 --> 00:10:13.744
 you like a lot of alone time,
 
 00:10:13.783 --> 00:10:15.443
 a lot of downtime fills up your cup.
 
 00:10:15.923 --> 00:10:17.225
 You may be someone that your
 
 00:10:17.284 --> 00:10:18.845
 regular contact with people
 
 00:10:19.245 --> 00:10:20.225
 may be on a monthly or
 
 00:10:20.264 --> 00:10:21.566
 biweekly basis where you're
 
 00:10:21.586 --> 00:10:22.265
 getting together with
 
 00:10:22.306 --> 00:10:23.306
 friends or family and then
 
 00:10:23.326 --> 00:10:24.267
 you feel satiated.
 
 00:10:24.287 --> 00:10:26.226
 You feel really seen, feel heard.
 
 00:10:26.527 --> 00:10:27.126
 You feel a sense of
 
 00:10:27.167 --> 00:10:28.548
 belonging and you feel safe.
 
 00:10:29.067 --> 00:10:30.328
 So we're gauging it on our
 
 00:10:30.389 --> 00:10:32.049
 sense of satisfaction and safety,
 
 00:10:32.350 --> 00:10:33.831
 not on what the community,
 
 00:10:33.870 --> 00:10:34.791
 the culture says.
 
 00:10:35.091 --> 00:10:35.812
 You should be hanging out
 
 00:10:35.831 --> 00:10:37.373
 with your friends every weekend.
 
 00:10:37.493 --> 00:10:38.033
 And if you don't,
 
 00:10:38.052 --> 00:10:39.114
 there must be something wrong with you.
 
 00:10:39.134 --> 00:10:40.455
 You don't have enough friends, right?
 
 00:10:40.934 --> 00:10:41.875
 It's not about that.
 
 00:10:41.995 --> 00:10:43.316
 In our fast-paced world,
 
 00:10:43.696 --> 00:10:45.397
 we need a lot more downtime sometimes,
 
 00:10:45.496 --> 00:10:47.258
 even if we are extroverted in nature,
 
 00:10:47.538 --> 00:10:48.578
 because our nervous systems
 
 00:10:48.619 --> 00:10:49.740
 have a lot to keep up with.
 
 00:10:50.019 --> 00:10:51.039
 with the evolution of our
 
 00:10:51.080 --> 00:10:52.801
 culture and technology,
 
 00:10:52.921 --> 00:10:53.721
 our nervous systems have
 
 00:10:53.760 --> 00:10:54.961
 not evolved yet to catch up
 
 00:10:55.000 --> 00:10:56.240
 to this extra stimulation.
 
 00:10:56.681 --> 00:10:58.322
 So we necessarily might have
 
 00:10:58.361 --> 00:10:59.522
 some need for more downtime.
 
 00:11:00.201 --> 00:11:02.743
 So when did the epidemic loneliness start?
 
 00:11:03.102 --> 00:11:04.822
 So really it's been building
 
 00:11:04.883 --> 00:11:06.903
 since the two thousands and
 
 00:11:07.024 --> 00:11:07.984
 with the increase in social
 
 00:11:08.043 --> 00:11:09.984
 isolation due to technology.
 
 00:11:10.043 --> 00:11:10.965
 And then we have like
 
 00:11:10.985 --> 00:11:12.605
 changing family structures, right?
 
 00:11:13.745 --> 00:11:15.346
 The decline of community engagement.
 
 00:11:15.365 --> 00:11:17.206
 This is such as like religious gatherings,
 
 00:11:17.547 --> 00:11:18.067
 clubs.
 
 00:11:18.506 --> 00:11:20.128
 I was even speaking to a
 
 00:11:20.248 --> 00:11:22.229
 local township professional.
 
 00:11:22.568 --> 00:11:23.369
 They were talking about
 
 00:11:23.408 --> 00:11:24.950
 there's a less of a need
 
 00:11:25.289 --> 00:11:27.071
 for in the future with
 
 00:11:27.091 --> 00:11:28.851
 future growth for youth.
 
 00:11:29.392 --> 00:11:31.273
 these sports arenas and
 
 00:11:31.313 --> 00:11:32.114
 things like that because
 
 00:11:32.214 --> 00:11:33.674
 less children are getting
 
 00:11:33.695 --> 00:11:34.735
 involved in sports.
 
 00:11:35.216 --> 00:11:35.417
 Now,
 
 00:11:35.797 --> 00:11:37.717
 does it have to do with busy parents
 
 00:11:37.738 --> 00:11:38.458
 that don't have time to
 
 00:11:38.499 --> 00:11:39.419
 drive them to soccer?
 
 00:11:39.700 --> 00:11:40.860
 Because if you have kids or
 
 00:11:40.941 --> 00:11:42.282
 if you've ever had children
 
 00:11:42.322 --> 00:11:43.403
 and taken them to sports,
 
 00:11:43.562 --> 00:11:44.823
 let alone multiple children,
 
 00:11:45.124 --> 00:11:46.325
 it takes a lot of your life.
 
 00:11:46.445 --> 00:11:47.245
 And so, of course,
 
 00:11:47.566 --> 00:11:48.225
 it's a place you can
 
 00:11:48.245 --> 00:11:49.246
 connect with other adults
 
 00:11:49.307 --> 00:11:51.067
 and quench your loneliness, right?
 
 00:11:51.107 --> 00:11:52.149
 But if in this space of
 
 00:11:52.229 --> 00:11:53.629
 polarization and separation,
 
 00:11:53.669 --> 00:11:54.811
 depending on where you live
 
 00:11:54.831 --> 00:11:55.951
 and what city you're living in,
 
 00:11:56.412 --> 00:11:58.094
 Some cities and some towns
 
 00:11:58.214 --> 00:11:58.794
 are a little bit more
 
 00:11:58.934 --> 00:11:59.975
 isolated and don't always
 
 00:12:00.015 --> 00:12:00.836
 talk to strangers,
 
 00:12:01.236 --> 00:12:04.360
 aka where I live in York, Pennsylvania.
 
 00:12:04.419 --> 00:12:05.642
 We live in this Pennsylvania
 
 00:12:05.682 --> 00:12:07.322
 Dutch cultivated
 
 00:12:07.624 --> 00:12:09.365
 environment and where there is a lot of,
 
 00:12:09.745 --> 00:12:11.466
 hey, don't talk to strangers.
 
 00:12:11.506 --> 00:12:12.307
 If you talk to someone at
 
 00:12:12.327 --> 00:12:13.208
 the grocery store line,
 
 00:12:13.249 --> 00:12:14.691
 they look at you with two heads.
 
 00:12:15.270 --> 00:12:16.312
 And it's just some of those things,
 
 00:12:16.351 --> 00:12:18.253
 if you've been here or you've moved here,
 
 00:12:18.873 --> 00:12:19.974
 I tell people that all the time.
 
 00:12:20.134 --> 00:12:20.354
 I say,
 
 00:12:20.374 --> 00:12:22.436
 how are you getting along in New York,
 
 00:12:22.456 --> 00:12:23.135
 Pennsylvania?
 
 00:12:23.596 --> 00:12:24.797
 And your town might be like this,
 
 00:12:24.856 --> 00:12:25.717
 but your town may be more
 
 00:12:25.798 --> 00:12:26.597
 open and friendly.
 
 00:12:27.019 --> 00:12:28.419
 But it depends on where you're at.
 
 00:12:28.539 --> 00:12:29.700
 And if you have a town where
 
 00:12:29.720 --> 00:12:30.500
 that's the culture,
 
 00:12:30.541 --> 00:12:31.642
 where keep to yourself,
 
 00:12:31.682 --> 00:12:33.263
 that it's socially kind of
 
 00:12:33.383 --> 00:12:34.462
 awkward to introduce
 
 00:12:34.482 --> 00:12:36.845
 yourselves in a public arena,
 
 00:12:37.125 --> 00:12:38.206
 like at the grocery store.
 
 00:12:39.486 --> 00:12:40.567
 How do you navigate that?
 
 00:12:40.988 --> 00:12:42.048
 But in general,
 
 00:12:42.089 --> 00:12:43.931
 we've seen this decline and
 
 00:12:43.990 --> 00:12:45.072
 this surge in loneliness,
 
 00:12:45.552 --> 00:12:46.933
 not only with the age of technology,
 
 00:12:46.994 --> 00:12:48.375
 but just these different
 
 00:12:49.015 --> 00:12:50.096
 spaces where we used to
 
 00:12:50.157 --> 00:12:52.318
 gather are just being dismantled.
 
 00:12:52.960 --> 00:12:54.721
 And they say it's not
 
 00:12:54.761 --> 00:12:55.802
 necessarily getting better,
 
 00:12:56.182 --> 00:12:57.644
 it's actually getting worse,
 
 00:12:58.144 --> 00:13:00.126
 especially without
 
 00:13:00.187 --> 00:13:01.928
 intentional shifts towards
 
 00:13:01.969 --> 00:13:02.708
 community building.
 
 00:13:03.509 --> 00:13:04.649
 and human connection,
 
 00:13:05.110 --> 00:13:06.650
 especially with the rise of remote work,
 
 00:13:07.331 --> 00:13:07.912
 technology.
 
 00:13:07.971 --> 00:13:08.731
 And then we have these
 
 00:13:08.792 --> 00:13:10.351
 fragmented social networks.
 
 00:13:11.413 --> 00:13:12.673
 How many of you are
 
 00:13:13.293 --> 00:13:14.354
 listening to this podcast?
 
 00:13:14.374 --> 00:13:15.094
 There's so many different
 
 00:13:15.134 --> 00:13:16.534
 ways you could be listening to this.
 
 00:13:16.835 --> 00:13:17.595
 It could be on YouTube.
 
 00:13:17.615 --> 00:13:18.995
 It could be live on Facebook.
 
 00:13:19.034 --> 00:13:20.796
 It could be on Spotify or on Apple.
 
 00:13:21.196 --> 00:13:22.096
 Or you could be listening to
 
 00:13:22.115 --> 00:13:22.917
 it somewhere else.
 
 00:13:23.856 --> 00:13:25.798
 And how many of the people
 
 00:13:25.817 --> 00:13:27.418
 that were on a network years ago,
 
 00:13:27.599 --> 00:13:28.458
 friends and family have
 
 00:13:28.499 --> 00:13:29.879
 moved to private networks
 
 00:13:30.259 --> 00:13:31.360
 or maybe got off of the
 
 00:13:31.400 --> 00:13:32.400
 social media space.
 
 00:13:32.801 --> 00:13:34.162
 This is again, we're fragmented.
 
 00:13:34.201 --> 00:13:36.842
 We're being separated through stress,
 
 00:13:37.062 --> 00:13:38.024
 through judgments,
 
 00:13:38.323 --> 00:13:39.664
 through our traumas we've
 
 00:13:39.705 --> 00:13:41.525
 had with organizations or people,
 
 00:13:41.826 --> 00:13:42.706
 through church hurt.
 
 00:13:42.885 --> 00:13:44.106
 There's so many things I hear.
 
 00:13:44.287 --> 00:13:45.488
 And of course, in two, three,
 
 00:13:45.807 --> 00:13:46.587
 two thousand thirteen,
 
 00:13:46.607 --> 00:13:47.568
 when I opened my clinic,
 
 00:13:47.928 --> 00:13:49.448
 like the foundation of my
 
 00:13:49.509 --> 00:13:50.509
 history and my family,
 
 00:13:50.529 --> 00:13:51.650
 my roots is about community
 
 00:13:51.671 --> 00:13:52.250
 and connection.
 
 00:13:52.730 --> 00:13:54.230
 So I'm like, yeah, let's do this.
 
 00:13:54.291 --> 00:13:55.851
 Yes, this is gonna be a holistic clinic,
 
 00:13:55.871 --> 00:13:56.652
 but it's gonna also be a
 
 00:13:56.711 --> 00:13:57.871
 gathering space for people
 
 00:13:57.912 --> 00:13:59.692
 to share on their
 
 00:13:59.732 --> 00:14:00.493
 like-minded and their
 
 00:14:00.533 --> 00:14:01.873
 journey for holistic wellness.
 
 00:14:01.932 --> 00:14:03.134
 Because we know that
 
 00:14:03.153 --> 00:14:04.114
 holistic wellness isn't
 
 00:14:04.134 --> 00:14:04.874
 just about popping
 
 00:14:04.913 --> 00:14:05.894
 supplements and changing
 
 00:14:05.913 --> 00:14:07.674
 your diet and doing essential oils for,
 
 00:14:07.894 --> 00:14:09.754
 you know, solutions for your health.
 
 00:14:10.075 --> 00:14:11.855
 It's a mind, body, spirit solution.
 
 00:14:11.916 --> 00:14:13.855
 So depending on the backgrounds,
 
 00:14:13.895 --> 00:14:15.076
 we have so much diversity
 
 00:14:15.096 --> 00:14:15.956
 that could come through.
 
 00:14:16.537 --> 00:14:18.077
 in working with empowerment
 
 00:14:18.097 --> 00:14:19.259
 through our spiritual-based
 
 00:14:19.278 --> 00:14:21.160
 practices or mindfulness or meditation.
 
 00:14:21.421 --> 00:14:22.302
 So I wanted to have a
 
 00:14:22.361 --> 00:14:24.524
 diverse space that really
 
 00:14:24.984 --> 00:14:26.424
 supported and cultivated
 
 00:14:27.426 --> 00:14:28.927
 the sense of belonging,
 
 00:14:29.567 --> 00:14:31.369
 and especially when doing
 
 00:14:31.408 --> 00:14:32.669
 the journey of empowerment
 
 00:14:32.730 --> 00:14:34.851
 and maybe holistic services for yourself.
 
 00:14:35.272 --> 00:14:36.592
 Sometimes family members or
 
 00:14:36.633 --> 00:14:37.293
 community members
 
 00:14:37.653 --> 00:14:38.554
 aren't always on board.
 
 00:14:38.815 --> 00:14:39.916
 And sometimes you're like
 
 00:14:39.936 --> 00:14:41.417
 the weird one that's doing
 
 00:14:41.456 --> 00:14:42.057
 something a little bit
 
 00:14:42.136 --> 00:14:43.457
 different that's culturally
 
 00:14:43.477 --> 00:14:45.318
 appropriate or something
 
 00:14:45.339 --> 00:14:46.620
 that your family did growing up.
 
 00:14:47.000 --> 00:14:48.260
 So that was my dream.
 
 00:14:48.480 --> 00:14:49.881
 And we did a really good job at it.
 
 00:14:50.403 --> 00:14:51.423
 Early in the two thousand
 
 00:14:51.623 --> 00:14:53.083
 thirteen two thousand tens,
 
 00:14:53.244 --> 00:14:54.384
 we started a community
 
 00:14:54.404 --> 00:14:55.706
 group called Holistic
 
 00:14:55.745 --> 00:14:57.086
 Connections or I'm sorry,
 
 00:14:57.527 --> 00:14:58.628
 Conscious Connections.
 
 00:14:59.067 --> 00:15:00.328
 And so we did that and it
 
 00:15:00.349 --> 00:15:01.210
 was really beautiful.
 
 00:15:01.350 --> 00:15:02.650
 And then I got too busy as a
 
 00:15:02.811 --> 00:15:04.111
 organizer of a clinic and
 
 00:15:04.152 --> 00:15:05.812
 we shut it down and we
 
 00:15:05.832 --> 00:15:07.153
 started it up again this year.
 
 00:15:08.134 --> 00:15:10.235
 And of course, I knew after COVID,
 
 00:15:11.034 --> 00:15:12.676
 seeing the separation,
 
 00:15:12.775 --> 00:15:14.157
 I wanted to create spaces
 
 00:15:14.197 --> 00:15:16.197
 that cultivated this sense
 
 00:15:16.217 --> 00:15:17.477
 of safety and belonging.
 
 00:15:17.977 --> 00:15:19.399
 And I met a lot of people
 
 00:15:19.418 --> 00:15:20.818
 who had gone on their journey,
 
 00:15:21.679 --> 00:15:22.659
 maybe if they were involved
 
 00:15:22.679 --> 00:15:24.181
 in a spiritual community or a group,
 
 00:15:24.201 --> 00:15:25.201
 whether it was a religious
 
 00:15:25.240 --> 00:15:26.881
 organization or non-religious,
 
 00:15:27.381 --> 00:15:28.702
 maybe a self-development group.
 
 00:15:29.442 --> 00:15:30.303
 there is something that
 
 00:15:30.344 --> 00:15:31.744
 people started to like
 
 00:15:31.803 --> 00:15:33.085
 bring up as this common
 
 00:15:33.184 --> 00:15:34.926
 theme of not feeling
 
 00:15:34.985 --> 00:15:36.866
 accepted not having
 
 00:15:36.966 --> 00:15:38.707
 straight or safe boundaries
 
 00:15:38.748 --> 00:15:39.928
 in the group so they felt
 
 00:15:40.009 --> 00:15:41.970
 not safe or seen or they
 
 00:15:41.990 --> 00:15:42.931
 felt that where it was
 
 00:15:42.971 --> 00:15:44.131
 maybe too many boundaries
 
 00:15:44.172 --> 00:15:44.751
 there was a lack of
 
 00:15:44.812 --> 00:15:45.972
 connection and authentic
 
 00:15:46.013 --> 00:15:47.393
 connection on the opposite
 
 00:15:47.413 --> 00:15:48.594
 side of the spectrum not
 
 00:15:48.634 --> 00:15:49.595
 enough boundaries would be
 
 00:15:49.735 --> 00:15:50.375
 maybe going to a
 
 00:15:50.414 --> 00:15:51.436
 spiritually based group
 
 00:15:51.475 --> 00:15:52.937
 where people don't ask if
 
 00:15:52.956 --> 00:15:54.918
 they can hug you and there's a sense of
 
 00:15:55.498 --> 00:15:56.798
 For for lack of a better word,
 
 00:15:56.818 --> 00:15:57.979
 without spacing judgment,
 
 00:15:58.058 --> 00:15:59.159
 I've heard this phrase was
 
 00:15:59.200 --> 00:16:00.821
 this kumbaya love and light
 
 00:16:00.860 --> 00:16:01.701
 type of thing.
 
 00:16:02.041 --> 00:16:03.022
 And for some people,
 
 00:16:03.422 --> 00:16:05.043
 that did not feel safe to them.
 
 00:16:05.143 --> 00:16:06.423
 For other people who they're just like,
 
 00:16:06.464 --> 00:16:08.664
 man, I love this open hearted space.
 
 00:16:08.725 --> 00:16:09.865
 It feels really safe to me.
 
 00:16:10.485 --> 00:16:11.765
 This is what people wanted.
 
 00:16:11.785 --> 00:16:12.647
 But for other people.
 
 00:16:12.986 --> 00:16:14.548
 There wasn't always boundaries,
 
 00:16:14.589 --> 00:16:16.251
 consistency and leadership,
 
 00:16:16.851 --> 00:16:17.913
 holding space where there
 
 00:16:17.953 --> 00:16:20.096
 wasn't trauma dumping or trauma sharing,
 
 00:16:20.116 --> 00:16:21.158
 where people were bonding
 
 00:16:21.217 --> 00:16:23.701
 over actual values and
 
 00:16:23.721 --> 00:16:24.481
 things that they cared
 
 00:16:24.522 --> 00:16:26.625
 about versus bonding over
 
 00:16:27.385 --> 00:16:28.528
 things that separated them
 
 00:16:28.587 --> 00:16:29.889
 or the things that wounded them.
 
 00:16:30.450 --> 00:16:32.030
 So there's a lot of factors there.
 
 00:16:32.171 --> 00:16:33.111
 And I feel like I've heard
 
 00:16:33.152 --> 00:16:34.613
 it more and more now,
 
 00:16:35.113 --> 00:16:36.433
 even after COVID with,
 
 00:16:36.673 --> 00:16:37.774
 I'll call it the great awakening.
 
 00:16:37.793 --> 00:16:39.635
 We talked about this in the last episode.
 
 00:16:40.635 --> 00:16:41.777
 And we talked about many
 
 00:16:41.817 --> 00:16:42.876
 people having a personal
 
 00:16:42.917 --> 00:16:43.957
 spiritual awakening,
 
 00:16:44.337 --> 00:16:45.839
 some sense of their identity shifts,
 
 00:16:45.879 --> 00:16:47.440
 who they are shifts,
 
 00:16:47.559 --> 00:16:48.701
 and then the type of people
 
 00:16:48.721 --> 00:16:49.561
 that are hanging out with
 
 00:16:49.620 --> 00:16:51.643
 shifts because their values have shifted.
 
 00:16:51.682 --> 00:16:51.962
 Right.
 
 00:16:52.423 --> 00:16:53.844
 And so when that happens,
 
 00:16:53.923 --> 00:16:55.644
 people are not sure if,
 
 00:16:55.784 --> 00:16:57.085
 how to then connect again.
 
 00:16:57.384 --> 00:16:58.926
 And when they go into a new space,
 
 00:16:59.186 --> 00:17:00.145
 there's lots of things that
 
 00:17:00.166 --> 00:17:02.086
 happen when you enter a new social space,
 
 00:17:02.126 --> 00:17:02.346
 right?
 
 00:17:02.606 --> 00:17:04.146
 There's what are the social dynamics?
 
 00:17:04.446 --> 00:17:05.627
 Who are the people that I'm talking to?
 
 00:17:05.667 --> 00:17:07.688
 What's socially acceptable to say?
 
 00:17:08.728 --> 00:17:09.248
 Especially if it's
 
 00:17:09.288 --> 00:17:10.848
 completely different in culture.
 
 00:17:11.148 --> 00:17:12.128
 Like I hear this all the
 
 00:17:12.169 --> 00:17:12.868
 time with people who are
 
 00:17:12.929 --> 00:17:14.730
 first starting out taking a yoga class.
 
 00:17:15.630 --> 00:17:15.809
 Uh,
 
 00:17:15.829 --> 00:17:18.392
 we do a trauma informed yoga classes at
 
 00:17:18.412 --> 00:17:18.951
 our clinic.
 
 00:17:19.313 --> 00:17:20.252
 And what that means is we
 
 00:17:20.292 --> 00:17:21.733
 want to make sure, um,
 
 00:17:21.773 --> 00:17:22.694
 that the nervous system of
 
 00:17:22.714 --> 00:17:23.855
 the human being coming in,
 
 00:17:23.875 --> 00:17:24.836
 it doesn't matter if they
 
 00:17:24.855 --> 00:17:26.196
 have big T trauma or they're just like,
 
 00:17:26.217 --> 00:17:26.557
 no, I just,
 
 00:17:26.656 --> 00:17:27.798
 I just been stressed in my life.
 
 00:17:27.837 --> 00:17:29.278
 I don't even identify as having trauma.
 
 00:17:29.318 --> 00:17:31.140
 It doesn't matter something
 
 00:17:31.180 --> 00:17:32.300
 that the container in which
 
 00:17:32.320 --> 00:17:33.320
 they're entering the
 
 00:17:33.361 --> 00:17:34.201
 nervous system of the human
 
 00:17:34.241 --> 00:17:35.442
 being coming in can
 
 00:17:35.501 --> 00:17:37.804
 actually relax enough to feel like, oh,
 
 00:17:37.844 --> 00:17:38.124
 cool.
 
 00:17:38.263 --> 00:17:39.964
 I'm actually feeling down,
 
 00:17:40.025 --> 00:17:41.246
 regulated and relaxed in
 
 00:17:41.266 --> 00:17:42.487
 this space and accepted.
 
 00:17:42.527 --> 00:17:42.586
 And,
 
 00:17:43.067 --> 00:17:44.607
 And that looks like an
 
 00:17:44.807 --> 00:17:45.828
 expert shared more about it
 
 00:17:45.888 --> 00:17:47.769
 in the trauma informed yoga
 
 00:17:48.109 --> 00:17:49.651
 podcast I did a couple episodes ago.
 
 00:17:50.010 --> 00:17:51.731
 But we apply this to all of
 
 00:17:51.852 --> 00:17:53.172
 our spaces for our groups
 
 00:17:53.212 --> 00:17:54.772
 and gatherings where we try
 
 00:17:54.813 --> 00:17:56.574
 our best to educate people
 
 00:17:56.673 --> 00:17:57.894
 on what the space looks like,
 
 00:17:57.934 --> 00:17:59.056
 the type of people that would be there,
 
 00:17:59.135 --> 00:18:00.336
 exactly what to expect when
 
 00:18:00.355 --> 00:18:01.777
 you come to the clinic,
 
 00:18:01.797 --> 00:18:02.837
 to the organization.
 
 00:18:03.337 --> 00:18:04.377
 And of course, when we get there,
 
 00:18:04.438 --> 00:18:05.598
 breaking the ice for people,
 
 00:18:05.699 --> 00:18:06.539
 introducing them,
 
 00:18:06.599 --> 00:18:07.400
 helping them meet other
 
 00:18:07.440 --> 00:18:08.921
 people and feel a sense of belonging.
 
 00:18:09.280 --> 00:18:10.161
 Have you ever been to a
 
 00:18:10.221 --> 00:18:12.061
 space where you're new and
 
 00:18:12.082 --> 00:18:13.402
 there's already a sense of
 
 00:18:13.461 --> 00:18:15.423
 belonging and it almost
 
 00:18:15.442 --> 00:18:16.343
 feels like you're the
 
 00:18:16.403 --> 00:18:18.103
 outsider coming in and the
 
 00:18:18.123 --> 00:18:19.223
 individuals might be making
 
 00:18:19.284 --> 00:18:20.804
 side jokes or inside jokes
 
 00:18:20.824 --> 00:18:22.224
 and there's a sense of clickiness.
 
 00:18:22.644 --> 00:18:23.444
 That is something that's
 
 00:18:23.525 --> 00:18:24.484
 really challenging for
 
 00:18:24.525 --> 00:18:27.066
 someone who's already feeling vulnerable,
 
 00:18:27.246 --> 00:18:28.385
 wanting to enter a new space,
 
 00:18:28.425 --> 00:18:29.346
 wanting to be accepted.
 
 00:18:29.446 --> 00:18:30.686
 And even more so if they've
 
 00:18:30.707 --> 00:18:32.666
 had challenges in the past
 
 00:18:33.027 --> 00:18:35.448
 with bullying or being put
 
 00:18:35.488 --> 00:18:36.848
 cast out of a group or an
 
 00:18:36.888 --> 00:18:38.409
 organization or something like that.
 
 00:18:38.769 --> 00:18:40.709
 So I keep those things in mind.
 
 00:18:40.990 --> 00:18:41.950
 That's a lot of reasons why
 
 00:18:41.990 --> 00:18:43.309
 people don't come out.
 
 00:18:43.390 --> 00:18:44.990
 Not only do they not know where to go,
 
 00:18:45.431 --> 00:18:46.070
 they don't know where to go
 
 00:18:46.111 --> 00:18:49.070
 that feels good and comfortable to them.
 
 00:18:49.230 --> 00:18:50.491
 And they don't know how to
 
 00:18:50.531 --> 00:18:51.612
 find places where they're
 
 00:18:51.632 --> 00:18:53.833
 going to be accepted versus judged,
 
 00:18:53.913 --> 00:18:54.932
 especially with everything
 
 00:18:54.972 --> 00:18:56.413
 we're seeing with how the
 
 00:18:56.532 --> 00:18:57.673
 algorithms on our social
 
 00:18:57.692 --> 00:18:59.733
 media accounts will feed us information.
 
 00:19:00.213 --> 00:19:01.193
 A lot of it's really biased
 
 00:19:01.213 --> 00:19:02.414
 to things we want to see or
 
 00:19:02.434 --> 00:19:03.315
 things we've clicked on.
 
 00:19:03.654 --> 00:19:05.576
 And so we get the loudest of
 
 00:19:05.596 --> 00:19:07.076
 the loud of the things that
 
 00:19:07.115 --> 00:19:08.875
 might be triggering and not
 
 00:19:08.916 --> 00:19:10.356
 necessarily the general
 
 00:19:10.656 --> 00:19:11.957
 overarching population of
 
 00:19:12.037 --> 00:19:13.478
 what actually people are like.
 
 00:19:13.917 --> 00:19:16.679
 Because if you go out and if
 
 00:19:16.739 --> 00:19:17.679
 I could press a button
 
 00:19:17.719 --> 00:19:20.940
 right now to erase your
 
 00:19:20.980 --> 00:19:21.880
 perceptions of other
 
 00:19:21.900 --> 00:19:23.221
 people's judgment or
 
 00:19:23.580 --> 00:19:24.441
 preconceived notions of
 
 00:19:24.480 --> 00:19:25.560
 what they might judge you
 
 00:19:25.580 --> 00:19:27.422
 for or how people might treat you,
 
 00:19:28.622 --> 00:19:29.682
 You still may experience
 
 00:19:29.702 --> 00:19:30.423
 some of the same things,
 
 00:19:30.482 --> 00:19:31.344
 especially if you are a
 
 00:19:31.384 --> 00:19:32.484
 minority or especially if
 
 00:19:32.505 --> 00:19:33.905
 you're in a space in which
 
 00:19:33.945 --> 00:19:35.406
 you don't feel safe either.
 
 00:19:35.747 --> 00:19:36.567
 Because then we put out
 
 00:19:36.626 --> 00:19:37.647
 unconscious body language
 
 00:19:37.688 --> 00:19:38.949
 cues that sometimes affect
 
 00:19:39.028 --> 00:19:40.670
 our experiences and environment.
 
 00:19:41.069 --> 00:19:42.050
 But if you were to go out
 
 00:19:42.131 --> 00:19:43.211
 and have that button pushed,
 
 00:19:43.231 --> 00:19:44.813
 you don't remember anything, right?
 
 00:19:45.413 --> 00:19:46.333
 You could go into a new
 
 00:19:46.353 --> 00:19:48.134
 situation and you might
 
 00:19:48.153 --> 00:19:49.693
 have a lot less anxiety.
 
 00:19:49.753 --> 00:19:51.914
 You might show up in this open, vulnerable,
 
 00:19:51.954 --> 00:19:52.694
 naive state.
 
 00:19:52.855 --> 00:19:54.756
 Now, is that always safe to do?
 
 00:19:55.615 --> 00:19:56.696
 Not necessarily, right?
 
 00:19:56.957 --> 00:19:57.957
 We want to have discernment
 
 00:19:57.977 --> 00:20:00.018
 with what a safe space looks like for us.
 
 00:20:00.317 --> 00:20:01.357
 But if we went into a space
 
 00:20:01.377 --> 00:20:02.739
 that was generally really
 
 00:20:02.778 --> 00:20:04.038
 comfortable and we were
 
 00:20:04.098 --> 00:20:05.339
 open in this vulnerability
 
 00:20:05.359 --> 00:20:06.460
 and we pressed that magic
 
 00:20:06.500 --> 00:20:07.440
 button to turn off all our
 
 00:20:07.480 --> 00:20:08.540
 memories of all our past
 
 00:20:08.980 --> 00:20:10.221
 issues in a group space
 
 00:20:10.280 --> 00:20:12.241
 where we could show up
 
 00:20:12.862 --> 00:20:14.343
 and really allow ourselves
 
 00:20:14.383 --> 00:20:15.624
 to have deeper connections.
 
 00:20:15.663 --> 00:20:16.544
 But this is the biggest
 
 00:20:16.564 --> 00:20:17.865
 thing that really stops people.
 
 00:20:18.525 --> 00:20:21.067
 I hear people say this all the time.
 
 00:20:21.507 --> 00:20:23.127
 I can't even count on my
 
 00:20:23.307 --> 00:20:24.808
 hands anymore how many
 
 00:20:24.868 --> 00:20:26.269
 times people have mentioned
 
 00:20:26.289 --> 00:20:27.290
 to us when they come into
 
 00:20:27.330 --> 00:20:28.830
 our clinic or come to our
 
 00:20:28.851 --> 00:20:30.893
 gatherings or come to our holistic expo
 
 00:20:31.532 --> 00:20:33.115
 that they have been watching us.
 
 00:20:33.174 --> 00:20:34.896
 They've been, quote unquote, stalking us.
 
 00:20:34.936 --> 00:20:35.717
 They say it jokingly.
 
 00:20:35.958 --> 00:20:36.858
 I hear this all the time.
 
 00:20:37.159 --> 00:20:38.220
 We've been stalking you for
 
 00:20:38.279 --> 00:20:39.922
 this many years, wanting to come in.
 
 00:20:39.961 --> 00:20:41.763
 I just didn't know what it would be like.
 
 00:20:41.784 --> 00:20:45.207
 And I wasn't sure if I'd be accepted.
 
 00:20:45.708 --> 00:20:47.128
 And every time I hear that,
 
 00:20:47.230 --> 00:20:48.631
 my heart is so grateful
 
 00:20:48.651 --> 00:20:49.751
 that they're there, finally.
 
 00:20:49.832 --> 00:20:51.213
 But my heart gets saddened
 
 00:20:51.233 --> 00:20:51.794
 because I'm like,
 
 00:20:52.634 --> 00:20:53.615
 what else can we do?
 
 00:20:53.895 --> 00:20:54.817
 So I've been meaning to do
 
 00:20:54.836 --> 00:20:55.817
 an episode like this for a
 
 00:20:55.876 --> 00:20:58.278
 long time and wonderful
 
 00:20:58.338 --> 00:20:59.480
 Sarah Johnson will actually
 
 00:20:59.500 --> 00:21:00.579
 be posting her episode.
 
 00:21:00.599 --> 00:21:01.621
 I did with her on her
 
 00:21:01.661 --> 00:21:03.782
 podcast about community and safety.
 
 00:21:03.803 --> 00:21:04.883
 She's a psychotherapist.
 
 00:21:05.063 --> 00:21:06.423
 We'll post that next week,
 
 00:21:06.785 --> 00:21:08.165
 but I just wanted to go
 
 00:21:08.346 --> 00:21:10.047
 into talking about this
 
 00:21:10.106 --> 00:21:12.028
 topic because it feels like
 
 00:21:12.087 --> 00:21:12.709
 it's something,
 
 00:21:12.828 --> 00:21:14.210
 especially right now in the world,
 
 00:21:14.230 --> 00:21:15.289
 like we need each other.
 
 00:21:15.671 --> 00:21:17.092
 We need each other and we need a space.
 
 00:21:17.132 --> 00:21:18.412
 We're all accepted no matter
 
 00:21:18.432 --> 00:21:19.333
 what our backgrounds are.
 
 00:21:19.732 --> 00:21:20.134
 And, um,
 
 00:21:20.894 --> 00:21:21.815
 one of the things I'm really
 
 00:21:21.855 --> 00:21:24.376
 proud of and like my heart
 
 00:21:24.396 --> 00:21:25.478
 was welling up about this
 
 00:21:25.557 --> 00:21:27.420
 actually this week after the election,
 
 00:21:27.980 --> 00:21:30.182
 we have a diversity in our team,
 
 00:21:30.241 --> 00:21:31.343
 diversity of very,
 
 00:21:32.183 --> 00:21:34.165
 very contrasting political beliefs,
 
 00:21:34.566 --> 00:21:36.007
 contrasting religious beliefs.
 
 00:21:36.048 --> 00:21:36.228
 I mean,
 
 00:21:36.268 --> 00:21:37.469
 we have people that work with us
 
 00:21:37.509 --> 00:21:38.769
 that are complete opposite
 
 00:21:38.829 --> 00:21:39.730
 ends of the spectrum.
 
 00:21:40.330 --> 00:21:42.613
 And it's really interesting to,
 
 00:21:42.973 --> 00:21:44.315
 especially over COVID, right?
 
 00:21:44.335 --> 00:21:45.655
 We had such different beliefs,
 
 00:21:46.056 --> 00:21:47.136
 but having this,
 
 00:21:48.200 --> 00:21:49.480
 mission statement for my
 
 00:21:49.520 --> 00:21:51.020
 clinic and why we're here
 
 00:21:51.082 --> 00:21:51.701
 we're here to make an
 
 00:21:51.801 --> 00:21:53.103
 impact and to meet clients
 
 00:21:53.123 --> 00:21:54.182
 where they are where they
 
 00:21:54.303 --> 00:21:55.604
 are and to give them the
 
 00:21:55.624 --> 00:21:57.065
 services that are
 
 00:21:57.105 --> 00:21:58.884
 appropriate for them what
 
 00:21:58.984 --> 00:22:00.705
 where they want to go based
 
 00:22:00.726 --> 00:22:01.646
 on their decision right
 
 00:22:01.666 --> 00:22:02.787
 their sovereignty I choose
 
 00:22:02.826 --> 00:22:04.167
 this and we're able to
 
 00:22:04.288 --> 00:22:05.368
 deliver it to them in a way
 
 00:22:05.409 --> 00:22:06.528
 that's relatable and
 
 00:22:06.548 --> 00:22:07.650
 grounded and understandable
 
 00:22:08.029 --> 00:22:08.690
 I've seen a lot of the
 
 00:22:08.730 --> 00:22:10.191
 services out there like Reiki.
 
 00:22:10.230 --> 00:22:11.371
 Of course, I'm a psychic medium.
 
 00:22:11.431 --> 00:22:12.612
 Some of my services being
 
 00:22:12.711 --> 00:22:14.152
 offered out there that
 
 00:22:14.751 --> 00:22:15.833
 maybe are scary for people
 
 00:22:15.853 --> 00:22:16.913
 in the way they're presented.
 
 00:22:16.952 --> 00:22:17.633
 They're not safe.
 
 00:22:17.653 --> 00:22:18.753
 They don't feel relatable.
 
 00:22:19.273 --> 00:22:20.615
 And I think we've talked
 
 00:22:20.634 --> 00:22:22.555
 about this many times on the podcast,
 
 00:22:22.934 --> 00:22:24.115
 that creating an
 
 00:22:24.215 --> 00:22:25.556
 expectation for so people
 
 00:22:25.596 --> 00:22:26.576
 know what to expect,
 
 00:22:26.876 --> 00:22:28.537
 that creates a sense of healing,
 
 00:22:28.696 --> 00:22:30.238
 a sense of safety, belonging.
 
 00:22:30.778 --> 00:22:32.318
 And it's actually builds the
 
 00:22:32.338 --> 00:22:35.079
 foundation for helping someone to heal.
 
 00:22:35.560 --> 00:22:37.602
 And that being our focus as
 
 00:22:37.622 --> 00:22:39.702
 a clinic with my team, like we say,
 
 00:22:39.762 --> 00:22:41.324
 no matter what our differences are,
 
 00:22:41.743 --> 00:22:44.565
 we have the determination
 
 00:22:44.945 --> 00:22:47.027
 to do our own personal development work,
 
 00:22:47.426 --> 00:22:48.227
 whatever that looks like
 
 00:22:48.247 --> 00:22:49.127
 for us at this time,
 
 00:22:49.147 --> 00:22:49.827
 because it's different.
 
 00:22:49.867 --> 00:22:50.628
 If some people are like,
 
 00:22:50.669 --> 00:22:51.669
 I'm going to do diet stuff.
 
 00:22:51.689 --> 00:22:53.490
 Some people it's internal mindset stuff.
 
 00:22:53.930 --> 00:22:54.651
 It's different,
 
 00:22:54.971 --> 00:22:55.851
 but we all agree on the
 
 00:22:55.891 --> 00:22:56.832
 four agreements that,
 
 00:22:57.071 --> 00:22:58.612
 That is an amazing book, by the way.
 
 00:22:59.333 --> 00:23:00.333
 Don't take things personally.
 
 00:23:00.373 --> 00:23:01.133
 Don't make assumptions.
 
 00:23:01.252 --> 00:23:02.472
 Always do your best and be
 
 00:23:02.492 --> 00:23:03.413
 impeccable with your words.
 
 00:23:03.433 --> 00:23:05.114
 So these are the things that combine,
 
 00:23:05.334 --> 00:23:06.534
 no matter what our differences are.
 
 00:23:06.914 --> 00:23:08.375
 We could be completely like
 
 00:23:08.555 --> 00:23:09.694
 opposite ends of the world,
 
 00:23:09.734 --> 00:23:11.115
 lived and come in and say, hey,
 
 00:23:11.435 --> 00:23:13.036
 we all agree in this
 
 00:23:13.076 --> 00:23:14.476
 community because that's
 
 00:23:14.516 --> 00:23:15.297
 what really creates
 
 00:23:15.336 --> 00:23:18.416
 community is one unity, come unity,
 
 00:23:18.517 --> 00:23:19.417
 the community,
 
 00:23:20.018 --> 00:23:22.137
 one sense or source of unity,
 
 00:23:22.218 --> 00:23:24.138
 that thing that unifies people together.
 
 00:23:24.858 --> 00:23:27.403
 And that is what I was
 
 00:23:27.442 --> 00:23:28.084
 actually tearing up.
 
 00:23:28.124 --> 00:23:28.724
 I feel like I'm going to
 
 00:23:28.744 --> 00:23:30.267
 tear up again right now talking about it.
 
 00:23:30.528 --> 00:23:33.011
 But over this past week,
 
 00:23:33.311 --> 00:23:34.413
 I was talking to our
 
 00:23:34.473 --> 00:23:35.315
 different staff members
 
 00:23:35.335 --> 00:23:36.916
 about how amazing it is
 
 00:23:37.377 --> 00:23:40.182
 that despite the differences
 
 00:23:40.762 --> 00:23:42.884
 And despite the difference in emotions,
 
 00:23:42.944 --> 00:23:44.046
 even collectively right now,
 
 00:23:44.145 --> 00:23:45.165
 so many people happy,
 
 00:23:45.205 --> 00:23:46.267
 so many people overjoyed,
 
 00:23:46.287 --> 00:23:47.468
 so many people devastated
 
 00:23:47.949 --> 00:23:49.169
 about the election and the
 
 00:23:49.189 --> 00:23:49.849
 state of the world.
 
 00:23:50.430 --> 00:23:51.090
 I said, you know,
 
 00:23:51.530 --> 00:23:53.172
 we have this beautiful light.
 
 00:23:53.373 --> 00:23:54.173
 And you know what that is?
 
 00:23:54.313 --> 00:23:55.513
 That's here to be of service.
 
 00:23:55.634 --> 00:23:57.256
 And not only it starts with ourselves,
 
 00:23:57.375 --> 00:23:58.395
 we are of service to
 
 00:23:58.435 --> 00:24:00.278
 ourselves through self-care,
 
 00:24:00.317 --> 00:24:01.659
 through our own personal development work,
 
 00:24:01.939 --> 00:24:03.359
 so that we can show up in a
 
 00:24:03.400 --> 00:24:05.000
 place of love and centeredness.
 
 00:24:05.040 --> 00:24:05.362
 Because
 
 00:24:05.842 --> 00:24:06.801
 If we're not centered,
 
 00:24:06.882 --> 00:24:08.462
 we're in more a fear state.
 
 00:24:08.623 --> 00:24:10.564
 And that can show up and look like anger.
 
 00:24:10.903 --> 00:24:12.404
 It can show up as powerlessness.
 
 00:24:12.464 --> 00:24:13.224
 It can show up in the way we
 
 00:24:13.265 --> 00:24:14.806
 communicate or not communicate.
 
 00:24:15.165 --> 00:24:16.486
 It can show up in community.
 
 00:24:16.865 --> 00:24:18.166
 And it's our responsibility
 
 00:24:18.227 --> 00:24:20.428
 to be self-aware and learn
 
 00:24:20.488 --> 00:24:22.067
 self-awareness tools and to
 
 00:24:22.229 --> 00:24:24.489
 grow that as we continue to
 
 00:24:24.528 --> 00:24:26.890
 evolve so that we can truly
 
 00:24:27.089 --> 00:24:28.830
 individually not only
 
 00:24:28.951 --> 00:24:31.432
 choose spaces and put our
 
 00:24:31.771 --> 00:24:33.413
 energy into space,
 
 00:24:33.653 --> 00:24:35.733
 communities and choices for
 
 00:24:35.794 --> 00:24:36.794
 our own personal life,
 
 00:24:36.814 --> 00:24:37.773
 for our health and wellness,
 
 00:24:38.134 --> 00:24:39.434
 but also make the choice to
 
 00:24:39.474 --> 00:24:41.154
 support a community and
 
 00:24:41.194 --> 00:24:42.535
 continue to be involved in it,
 
 00:24:42.755 --> 00:24:44.915
 to show up in a community
 
 00:24:44.955 --> 00:24:47.297
 space in a way that is
 
 00:24:47.356 --> 00:24:49.416
 authentic for us based on
 
 00:24:49.457 --> 00:24:50.458
 the different roles that
 
 00:24:50.637 --> 00:24:51.877
 people can play in community.
 
 00:24:51.938 --> 00:24:52.958
 And I'll share the different
 
 00:24:52.998 --> 00:24:54.898
 roles that come up in community.
 
 00:24:55.939 --> 00:24:58.160
 So the challenges also,
 
 00:24:58.180 --> 00:24:58.819
 I wanted to mention the
 
 00:24:58.839 --> 00:25:00.839
 challenges also with anxiety,
 
 00:25:01.020 --> 00:25:03.701
 that the group, the anxiety,
 
 00:25:03.800 --> 00:25:04.781
 mental health issues,
 
 00:25:04.882 --> 00:25:06.741
 especially social anxiety has, of course,
 
 00:25:06.781 --> 00:25:07.342
 increased.
 
 00:25:07.782 --> 00:25:09.323
 And I think that the fear of
 
 00:25:09.343 --> 00:25:11.564
 rejection is the most
 
 00:25:11.743 --> 00:25:12.703
 number one thing that help
 
 00:25:12.743 --> 00:25:13.804
 makes it hard for people to
 
 00:25:13.864 --> 00:25:15.805
 join or join groups or meet new people.
 
 00:25:16.962 --> 00:25:20.965
 And I think that if I was to say one thing,
 
 00:25:21.326 --> 00:25:23.147
 this is where Sarah is so
 
 00:25:23.208 --> 00:25:24.548
 powerful in this next episode.
 
 00:25:25.148 --> 00:25:26.009
 I'm going to paraphrase here,
 
 00:25:26.029 --> 00:25:28.010
 but she shares that the
 
 00:25:28.050 --> 00:25:29.332
 biggest thing that can help us,
 
 00:25:29.511 --> 00:25:30.752
 people can help us so much,
 
 00:25:30.772 --> 00:25:31.513
 but they also can be the
 
 00:25:31.534 --> 00:25:32.694
 greatest source of hurt and
 
 00:25:32.815 --> 00:25:33.955
 the greatest source of healing.
 
 00:25:35.777 --> 00:25:36.837
 So I love that.
 
 00:25:37.097 --> 00:25:38.097
 And I'm paraphrasing it
 
 00:25:38.117 --> 00:25:38.659
 because I don't remember
 
 00:25:38.679 --> 00:25:39.338
 exactly what it was.
 
 00:25:39.378 --> 00:25:40.380
 But that was the concept.
 
 00:25:40.640 --> 00:25:41.840
 And I was like, this is pretty cool.
 
 00:25:41.980 --> 00:25:42.121
 Like,
 
 00:25:42.441 --> 00:25:44.842
 this is absolutely exactly what we
 
 00:25:44.882 --> 00:25:46.643
 need is to understand that
 
 00:25:46.963 --> 00:25:48.684
 we need each other to heal.
 
 00:25:48.904 --> 00:25:50.125
 And we also need space from
 
 00:25:50.165 --> 00:25:51.405
 each other and to learn to
 
 00:25:51.445 --> 00:25:52.686
 discern what that looks
 
 00:25:52.707 --> 00:25:53.907
 like and when that looks like.
 
 00:25:54.807 --> 00:25:55.888
 You need that space.
 
 00:25:56.288 --> 00:25:57.210
 So as human beings,
 
 00:25:57.269 --> 00:25:58.430
 I mentioned here the
 
 00:25:58.450 --> 00:25:59.151
 biological and
 
 00:25:59.351 --> 00:26:01.112
 physiological need for connection.
 
 00:26:01.392 --> 00:26:03.333
 This creates safety in our nervous system.
 
 00:26:03.854 --> 00:26:04.034
 So
 
 00:26:05.193 --> 00:26:06.494
 If you're someone that is
 
 00:26:06.555 --> 00:26:07.435
 trying to solve all the
 
 00:26:07.455 --> 00:26:09.636
 problems of the world or of your family,
 
 00:26:09.817 --> 00:26:12.298
 you know, and you are in overdrive,
 
 00:26:12.660 --> 00:26:13.720
 just remember if you don't
 
 00:26:13.759 --> 00:26:15.662
 have that sense of connection and safety,
 
 00:26:16.122 --> 00:26:17.682
 you're hardwired for it.
 
 00:26:18.002 --> 00:26:19.163
 And if you're not getting it,
 
 00:26:19.884 --> 00:26:20.664
 you're not necessarily
 
 00:26:20.684 --> 00:26:22.026
 being able to utilize all
 
 00:26:22.066 --> 00:26:23.067
 the tools you could for
 
 00:26:23.106 --> 00:26:23.886
 stress management.
 
 00:26:24.267 --> 00:26:25.688
 Because belonging to a group
 
 00:26:25.807 --> 00:26:26.929
 can reduce stress.
 
 00:26:27.369 --> 00:26:29.111
 It can improve our emotional well-being.
 
 00:26:29.590 --> 00:26:30.770
 and it can help us feel safer.
 
 00:26:31.330 --> 00:26:32.271
 And studies show that
 
 00:26:32.332 --> 00:26:34.172
 community and social support,
 
 00:26:34.592 --> 00:26:35.531
 these boosts our mental
 
 00:26:35.571 --> 00:26:37.452
 health and even our physical health.
 
 00:26:37.792 --> 00:26:38.972
 So this like lowering stress
 
 00:26:39.212 --> 00:26:40.173
 hormone like cortisol.
 
 00:26:40.513 --> 00:26:41.413
 And it really does have that
 
 00:26:41.453 --> 00:26:42.253
 trickle down effect.
 
 00:26:42.294 --> 00:26:43.513
 Because remember I said that
 
 00:26:43.534 --> 00:26:45.855
 this epidemic is similar
 
 00:26:45.894 --> 00:26:46.795
 and comparable in effects
 
 00:26:46.835 --> 00:26:47.714
 of smoking fifteen
 
 00:26:47.734 --> 00:26:49.296
 cigarettes a day and its health risks.
 
 00:26:49.435 --> 00:26:51.016
 And this is just how the
 
 00:26:51.056 --> 00:26:52.195
 mind-body connection
 
 00:26:52.435 --> 00:26:53.916
 trickles down to how your
 
 00:26:54.057 --> 00:26:55.176
 autonomic nervous system,
 
 00:26:55.396 --> 00:26:56.336
 the stress response,
 
 00:26:56.576 --> 00:26:58.718
 if it's kicked in high gear for too long,
 
 00:26:59.198 --> 00:27:00.238
 you're going to can create
 
 00:27:00.278 --> 00:27:01.199
 all these health issues.
 
 00:27:01.759 --> 00:27:04.359
 And of course, when we can get together,
 
 00:27:04.779 --> 00:27:04.941
 you know,
 
 00:27:04.961 --> 00:27:06.641
 this importance of community healing,
 
 00:27:07.362 --> 00:27:09.021
 we can heal through this connection.
 
 00:27:09.162 --> 00:27:10.583
 And this is where we can
 
 00:27:11.202 --> 00:27:14.184
 help build new innovative structures,
 
 00:27:14.744 --> 00:27:16.645
 we can share ideas of ways
 
 00:27:16.665 --> 00:27:17.185
 that things could
 
 00:27:17.425 --> 00:27:19.886
 we could solve problems in our community,
 
 00:27:19.967 --> 00:27:22.407
 in our families, share recipes,
 
 00:27:22.708 --> 00:27:24.728
 share ways that we've
 
 00:27:24.807 --> 00:27:26.608
 overcome or empowered ourself,
 
 00:27:26.929 --> 00:27:27.909
 or even just to be there
 
 00:27:27.929 --> 00:27:29.490
 for someone when they need support.
 
 00:27:29.990 --> 00:27:31.691
 So I think that that is one
 
 00:27:31.730 --> 00:27:33.351
 of the biggest things why I
 
 00:27:33.391 --> 00:27:34.511
 feel so passionate about
 
 00:27:34.571 --> 00:27:35.471
 supporting community.
 
 00:27:36.251 --> 00:27:37.752
 And I think if we have
 
 00:27:37.772 --> 00:27:38.534
 community to help us
 
 00:27:38.594 --> 00:27:41.375
 process our emotions and experiences,
 
 00:27:41.816 --> 00:27:44.738
 but also to have fun with, to play,
 
 00:27:44.817 --> 00:27:46.900
 to create intellectual and
 
 00:27:46.940 --> 00:27:49.241
 emotional bonds, physical touch.
 
 00:27:49.281 --> 00:27:50.422
 I'm a licensed massage therapist.
 
 00:27:50.481 --> 00:27:51.863
 We learn how much physical
 
 00:27:51.923 --> 00:27:53.243
 touch is so important for
 
 00:27:53.325 --> 00:27:55.066
 our survival as babies that
 
 00:27:55.105 --> 00:27:56.547
 we could not survive without it.
 
 00:27:57.047 --> 00:27:58.048
 And that physical touch can
 
 00:27:58.087 --> 00:27:59.608
 help calm our nervous systems,
 
 00:27:59.929 --> 00:28:01.590
 especially safe physical touch,
 
 00:28:01.810 --> 00:28:03.531
 touch that is consented.
 
 00:28:03.892 --> 00:28:04.471
 And that, you know,
 
 00:28:04.531 --> 00:28:06.212
 hugging and holding hands,
 
 00:28:06.613 --> 00:28:07.973
 eye contact can also be
 
 00:28:08.134 --> 00:28:10.034
 that precursor to physical touch that's,
 
 00:28:10.153 --> 00:28:11.214
 of course, consented.
 
 00:28:11.634 --> 00:28:14.516
 But that's just it's just important.
 
 00:28:14.875 --> 00:28:15.816
 So I'm going to share a
 
 00:28:15.836 --> 00:28:16.777
 little bit about the trauma
 
 00:28:16.797 --> 00:28:17.576
 informed spaces.
 
 00:28:17.596 --> 00:28:19.497
 So what I look for when I go
 
 00:28:19.557 --> 00:28:22.097
 into a space myself are a
 
 00:28:22.137 --> 00:28:22.838
 couple of things.
 
 00:28:23.038 --> 00:28:24.239
 And these are things you can
 
 00:28:24.519 --> 00:28:25.500
 maybe ask yourself when
 
 00:28:25.519 --> 00:28:26.480
 you're going into a new
 
 00:28:26.519 --> 00:28:29.560
 location or maybe trying out a new group.
 
 00:28:30.321 --> 00:28:31.282
 is safety.
 
 00:28:31.383 --> 00:28:32.143
 So you want to make sure
 
 00:28:32.163 --> 00:28:33.003
 that you feel both
 
 00:28:33.023 --> 00:28:34.444
 physically and emotionally safe.
 
 00:28:35.066 --> 00:28:35.766
 And of course,
 
 00:28:36.166 --> 00:28:37.688
 that may be something that
 
 00:28:37.887 --> 00:28:40.009
 is pro-stories.
 
 00:28:40.029 --> 00:28:41.029
 Like you might have stories
 
 00:28:41.109 --> 00:28:42.310
 from your past that are
 
 00:28:42.371 --> 00:28:44.452
 creating a sense of not
 
 00:28:44.593 --> 00:28:46.694
 feeling safe when you really are safe.
 
 00:28:47.134 --> 00:28:47.875
 So those are things to
 
 00:28:47.915 --> 00:28:50.678
 really have a counselor, a mentor,
 
 00:28:51.617 --> 00:28:52.219
 a guide,
 
 00:28:52.259 --> 00:28:54.259
 a friend that you can talk to
 
 00:28:54.398 --> 00:28:56.500
 about your apprehensions
 
 00:28:56.519 --> 00:28:57.800
 about entering into a new
 
 00:28:57.861 --> 00:28:59.981
 space and seeing if the
 
 00:29:00.001 --> 00:29:02.202
 things that you're feeling, processing,
 
 00:29:02.262 --> 00:29:03.563
 bouncing them off of someone else,
 
 00:29:03.603 --> 00:29:04.544
 if this is something that
 
 00:29:04.604 --> 00:29:07.724
 is just your response from
 
 00:29:07.765 --> 00:29:08.765
 your history or if it's
 
 00:29:08.785 --> 00:29:09.885
 something that may be warranted.
 
 00:29:10.685 --> 00:29:12.646
 So these trauma informed
 
 00:29:12.666 --> 00:29:14.247
 space principles are
 
 00:29:14.428 --> 00:29:15.748
 actually adapted from the
 
 00:29:15.867 --> 00:29:17.269
 lovely Allie Coker.
 
 00:29:17.409 --> 00:29:18.528
 She has been on our podcast
 
 00:29:18.588 --> 00:29:19.308
 multiple times.
 
 00:29:19.328 --> 00:29:21.329
 She is a psychotherapist and
 
 00:29:21.410 --> 00:29:22.851
 she has a beautiful trauma
 
 00:29:22.911 --> 00:29:24.932
 informed care for spiritual
 
 00:29:24.971 --> 00:29:26.852
 providers course that she offers.
 
 00:29:27.231 --> 00:29:28.173
 This is for ministers,
 
 00:29:28.212 --> 00:29:29.532
 people in the healing profession.
 
 00:29:30.034 --> 00:29:32.114
 And I love her course.
 
 00:29:32.153 --> 00:29:33.775
 I love her work because
 
 00:29:34.174 --> 00:29:36.135
 she's just so soft and soft and
 
 00:29:36.576 --> 00:29:37.435
 She's thoughtful,
 
 00:29:37.817 --> 00:29:39.176
 and she's very supportive
 
 00:29:39.376 --> 00:29:41.897
 of helping create healing through trauma.
 
 00:29:42.357 --> 00:29:44.118
 And all of us, myself included,
 
 00:29:44.259 --> 00:29:46.140
 are trying to take these
 
 00:29:46.180 --> 00:29:48.060
 types of principles and
 
 00:29:48.141 --> 00:29:49.121
 understand how we can
 
 00:29:49.561 --> 00:29:51.082
 educate the world and yourself,
 
 00:29:51.461 --> 00:29:52.242
 the listeners here,
 
 00:29:52.303 --> 00:29:53.742
 so you can empower yourself
 
 00:29:53.762 --> 00:29:54.963
 when choosing a new space.
 
 00:29:55.523 --> 00:29:56.164
 So safety,
 
 00:29:56.585 --> 00:29:58.306
 and safety is a topic that I'm
 
 00:29:58.326 --> 00:29:59.307
 not going to go deep into.
 
 00:29:59.346 --> 00:30:00.267
 We talk a little bit about
 
 00:30:00.287 --> 00:30:01.407
 this in the next episode.
 
 00:30:02.028 --> 00:30:03.990
 But trustworthiness and transparency.
 
 00:30:04.329 --> 00:30:06.092
 So open communication and
 
 00:30:06.132 --> 00:30:07.231
 clear boundaries.
 
 00:30:07.613 --> 00:30:08.232
 These are the things I
 
 00:30:08.252 --> 00:30:09.394
 talked about earlier where
 
 00:30:09.773 --> 00:30:10.855
 boundaries are crossed.
 
 00:30:10.894 --> 00:30:12.056
 There's two rigid boundaries
 
 00:30:12.096 --> 00:30:13.277
 or two open boundaries.
 
 00:30:13.497 --> 00:30:14.458
 Because boundaries is what
 
 00:30:14.498 --> 00:30:15.919
 creates a container of safety.
 
 00:30:16.618 --> 00:30:18.902
 And whenever I hold space, so for example,
 
 00:30:18.942 --> 00:30:20.223
 in any group that I lead,
 
 00:30:20.785 --> 00:30:21.925
 I open with letting people
 
 00:30:21.965 --> 00:30:24.630
 know why we're here, sharing who I am,
 
 00:30:25.190 --> 00:30:26.332
 giving an offering to say,
 
 00:30:26.372 --> 00:30:27.373
 we're going to potentially
 
 00:30:27.413 --> 00:30:28.694
 go around the room to break the ice.
 
 00:30:28.734 --> 00:30:29.736
 You're welcome to share.
 
 00:30:30.096 --> 00:30:31.659
 But you also don't have to share.
 
 00:30:31.798 --> 00:30:33.140
 That creates a sense of safety.
 
 00:30:34.122 --> 00:30:35.103
 And also transparency,
 
 00:30:35.143 --> 00:30:35.682
 like we're going to go
 
 00:30:35.702 --> 00:30:36.724
 share in a second here.
 
 00:30:36.765 --> 00:30:37.665
 And like, who are we?
 
 00:30:37.685 --> 00:30:38.266
 What are we here?
 
 00:30:38.906 --> 00:30:39.988
 I kind of give prompts to
 
 00:30:40.028 --> 00:30:43.011
 share what's the key points
 
 00:30:43.071 --> 00:30:44.432
 of opening up the space,
 
 00:30:44.933 --> 00:30:45.714
 but also giving people
 
 00:30:45.755 --> 00:30:47.195
 permission that they don't have to,
 
 00:30:47.316 --> 00:30:48.076
 the power of choice,
 
 00:30:48.096 --> 00:30:49.157
 they don't have to share.
 
 00:30:49.959 --> 00:30:50.180
 And
 
 00:30:51.564 --> 00:30:52.825
 The other thing I also share
 
 00:30:53.005 --> 00:30:54.026
 in opening up and creating
 
 00:30:54.066 --> 00:30:55.767
 boundaries is I say what
 
 00:30:55.846 --> 00:30:56.907
 the space is for.
 
 00:30:57.827 --> 00:30:59.148
 And I give examples of what
 
 00:30:59.209 --> 00:31:00.049
 the space is for.
 
 00:31:00.269 --> 00:31:02.050
 So for example,
 
 00:31:02.111 --> 00:31:02.832
 in our Daughters of the
 
 00:31:02.892 --> 00:31:03.913
 Hollow Women's Circle,
 
 00:31:04.573 --> 00:31:06.074
 we do a part where we share.
 
 00:31:06.334 --> 00:31:07.535
 We do a meditation.
 
 00:31:07.555 --> 00:31:08.596
 We do yoga together.
 
 00:31:08.895 --> 00:31:09.777
 And we get together and talk
 
 00:31:09.817 --> 00:31:10.616
 about the themes of the
 
 00:31:10.676 --> 00:31:11.617
 seasons and the cycles.
 
 00:31:11.637 --> 00:31:12.878
 We talk about astrology.
 
 00:31:13.159 --> 00:31:14.059
 And we connect as women.
 
 00:31:14.299 --> 00:31:15.300
 But one of the core pieces
 
 00:31:15.381 --> 00:31:16.662
 of the circle every month
 
 00:31:16.701 --> 00:31:17.962
 is we have a beautiful deck
 
 00:31:17.982 --> 00:31:19.523
 of oracle cards that are
 
 00:31:19.564 --> 00:31:20.564
 laid out that's based on
 
 00:31:20.584 --> 00:31:21.365
 the theme for the month.
 
 00:31:21.505 --> 00:31:22.365
 And everyone picks one.
 
 00:31:22.384 --> 00:31:22.986
 We pull one.
 
 00:31:23.486 --> 00:31:24.986
 And during our sharing time,
 
 00:31:25.086 --> 00:31:26.166
 we basically talk about,
 
 00:31:26.207 --> 00:31:27.547
 what do the card means to us?
 
 00:31:27.666 --> 00:31:28.166
 And also,
 
 00:31:28.247 --> 00:31:29.528
 what does the meditation that we
 
 00:31:29.567 --> 00:31:30.887
 did mean to us?
 
 00:31:30.928 --> 00:31:31.587
 Do we have anything
 
 00:31:31.647 --> 00:31:33.048
 significant that came up for us?
 
 00:31:33.429 --> 00:31:35.128
 And because that particular
 
 00:31:35.189 --> 00:31:38.349
 invitation is opening up this sense of,
 
 00:31:38.691 --> 00:31:39.631
 oh my gosh, vulnerability,
 
 00:31:39.691 --> 00:31:41.431
 and I'm going to share with these people,
 
 00:31:41.892 --> 00:31:42.852
 usually this sense of
 
 00:31:42.872 --> 00:31:43.872
 belonging has already set
 
 00:31:43.912 --> 00:31:45.113
 into the room because of
 
 00:31:45.232 --> 00:31:48.374
 holding a space of authenticity, openness,
 
 00:31:48.413 --> 00:31:49.114
 transparency.
 
 00:31:49.733 --> 00:31:50.836
 and professional boundaries.
 
 00:31:50.895 --> 00:31:52.018
 This is a space where I'm
 
 00:31:52.038 --> 00:31:52.739
 going to share a little bit
 
 00:31:52.759 --> 00:31:53.881
 about me and be vulnerable,
 
 00:31:54.142 --> 00:31:54.982
 still professional,
 
 00:31:55.243 --> 00:31:56.285
 but also allow that you
 
 00:31:56.305 --> 00:31:57.647
 guys have permission to do the same.
 
 00:31:58.189 --> 00:32:00.092
 And I set a boundary in
 
 00:32:00.112 --> 00:32:02.476
 holding that space that, hey,
 
 00:32:03.529 --> 00:32:04.530
 Just so you guys know,
 
 00:32:04.730 --> 00:32:05.992
 you have two minutes to share.
 
 00:32:06.012 --> 00:32:07.413
 I have a lovely timer here,
 
 00:32:07.815 --> 00:32:09.717
 and this will be your time to talk.
 
 00:32:09.836 --> 00:32:10.657
 And once it goes off,
 
 00:32:10.678 --> 00:32:11.939
 we'll move on to the next person.
 
 00:32:12.359 --> 00:32:13.580
 But I specifically give them
 
 00:32:13.701 --> 00:32:14.622
 a structure and say,
 
 00:32:14.701 --> 00:32:15.763
 share what came up for you
 
 00:32:15.784 --> 00:32:17.465
 that was amazing or supportive,
 
 00:32:17.846 --> 00:32:19.748
 what you want to get rid of
 
 00:32:19.788 --> 00:32:21.130
 this month or work on.
 
 00:32:21.569 --> 00:32:22.691
 that you're alleviating
 
 00:32:22.730 --> 00:32:23.892
 maybe a negative mindset or
 
 00:32:23.932 --> 00:32:25.054
 thought or whatever it is.
 
 00:32:25.554 --> 00:32:27.737
 But I specifically lay foundation and say,
 
 00:32:27.777 --> 00:32:29.959
 remember, we are not therapists here.
 
 00:32:29.979 --> 00:32:31.400
 We're here to support and
 
 00:32:31.440 --> 00:32:33.422
 mentorship and camaraderie
 
 00:32:33.442 --> 00:32:35.565
 as women sharing our wisdom.
 
 00:32:35.964 --> 00:32:40.009
 And I share a invitation for
 
 00:32:40.048 --> 00:32:41.191
 consent to say,
 
 00:32:41.431 --> 00:32:43.053
 if you have something you're sharing,
 
 00:32:44.333 --> 00:32:45.753
 Like, hey, this card meant this to me.
 
 00:32:45.773 --> 00:32:46.654
 It was so cool.
 
 00:32:47.355 --> 00:32:48.415
 Whatever the comment is,
 
 00:32:48.955 --> 00:32:50.217
 that no one else in the
 
 00:32:50.277 --> 00:32:53.720
 circle is to take what
 
 00:32:53.799 --> 00:32:56.882
 you've said as a call for you need help.
 
 00:32:57.082 --> 00:32:57.821
 You need fixing.
 
 00:32:57.902 --> 00:32:58.702
 Something's wrong with you.
 
 00:32:58.742 --> 00:32:59.683
 You want advice,
 
 00:33:00.124 --> 00:33:01.664
 especially in a group of women, right?
 
 00:33:01.684 --> 00:33:03.125
 You ever get an advice from
 
 00:33:03.165 --> 00:33:04.207
 a friend or family member
 
 00:33:04.307 --> 00:33:06.008
 or even a stranger that you
 
 00:33:06.048 --> 00:33:07.308
 have not asked for,
 
 00:33:07.788 --> 00:33:08.789
 that there's an assumption
 
 00:33:08.849 --> 00:33:11.811
 made by that party that you have
 
 00:33:11.912 --> 00:33:13.333
 have something wrong in your life,
 
 00:33:13.432 --> 00:33:14.594
 especially when you're sharing like, hey,
 
 00:33:14.614 --> 00:33:15.953
 I'm going through some stress right now.
 
 00:33:16.535 --> 00:33:18.415
 This card I pulled in this
 
 00:33:18.435 --> 00:33:19.375
 women's group is really
 
 00:33:19.415 --> 00:33:20.176
 significant to me.
 
 00:33:20.557 --> 00:33:22.438
 And then the sharing goes on,
 
 00:33:22.498 --> 00:33:24.479
 but someone in the audience is like, well,
 
 00:33:24.519 --> 00:33:25.359
 after she's done talking,
 
 00:33:25.420 --> 00:33:26.319
 let me tell her a little
 
 00:33:26.339 --> 00:33:27.560
 bit about how I got through
 
 00:33:27.601 --> 00:33:29.102
 this and how this happened for me.
 
 00:33:29.662 --> 00:33:30.482
 That is a...
 
 00:33:32.384 --> 00:33:33.523
 That is not allowed in our group.
 
 00:33:33.584 --> 00:33:34.183
 I just set that as a
 
 00:33:34.243 --> 00:33:36.424
 boundary because in an unconscious,
 
 00:33:36.724 --> 00:33:39.166
 unspoken way, we're saying to that person,
 
 00:33:39.567 --> 00:33:40.406
 something's wrong with you
 
 00:33:40.426 --> 00:33:41.468
 that you're feeling this way,
 
 00:33:41.748 --> 00:33:42.567
 that you're expressing
 
 00:33:42.587 --> 00:33:43.608
 whatever your needs are.
 
 00:33:44.108 --> 00:33:44.808
 And really,
 
 00:33:44.848 --> 00:33:46.109
 it's more like if you would
 
 00:33:46.150 --> 00:33:47.789
 like advice or support from
 
 00:33:47.829 --> 00:33:49.030
 the wisdom of these amazing
 
 00:33:49.070 --> 00:33:49.830
 women in this group,
 
 00:33:49.911 --> 00:33:51.432
 because we have all different ages,
 
 00:33:51.491 --> 00:33:51.731
 right?
 
 00:33:52.172 --> 00:33:54.532
 So much wisdom comes with us as we age.
 
 00:33:55.193 --> 00:33:55.874
 We allow that.
 
 00:33:55.973 --> 00:33:57.855
 But I make it firm in the
 
 00:33:57.875 --> 00:33:58.815
 container that we're not
 
 00:33:58.875 --> 00:34:00.195
 psychotherapists and we're
 
 00:34:00.455 --> 00:34:01.757
 This is what this is what is
 
 00:34:01.797 --> 00:34:02.957
 allowed and is appropriate
 
 00:34:02.997 --> 00:34:03.938
 as far as sharing goes.
 
 00:34:04.018 --> 00:34:04.798
 And this is where we draw
 
 00:34:04.817 --> 00:34:05.959
 the line that it moves into.
 
 00:34:06.378 --> 00:34:06.618
 Like,
 
 00:34:06.759 --> 00:34:08.400
 let me just dump all my stuff that's
 
 00:34:08.420 --> 00:34:10.641
 happening and go into that space.
 
 00:34:11.121 --> 00:34:12.621
 And I say this because I've
 
 00:34:12.641 --> 00:34:14.081
 had a lot of women in
 
 00:34:14.121 --> 00:34:15.262
 particular that have gone
 
 00:34:15.302 --> 00:34:17.724
 to maybe book clubs or
 
 00:34:17.864 --> 00:34:19.385
 other spaces that are just
 
 00:34:19.405 --> 00:34:22.085
 for connection that they said, quote,
 
 00:34:22.266 --> 00:34:23.706
 it turned into a bitch fest.
 
 00:34:24.246 --> 00:34:25.447
 pretty easy for women to get
 
 00:34:25.487 --> 00:34:26.429
 together and start
 
 00:34:26.449 --> 00:34:28.150
 complaining about their lives, right?
 
 00:34:28.550 --> 00:34:29.472
 But if you're in a space
 
 00:34:29.492 --> 00:34:31.112
 that's a container that's
 
 00:34:31.172 --> 00:34:32.873
 led by a facilitator that
 
 00:34:32.914 --> 00:34:35.916
 has the awareness of holding boundaries,
 
 00:34:35.976 --> 00:34:37.257
 holding safe boundaries,
 
 00:34:37.898 --> 00:34:38.798
 allowing a space for
 
 00:34:39.599 --> 00:34:40.820
 belonging so that can be
 
 00:34:40.860 --> 00:34:42.561
 authentic communication and
 
 00:34:42.581 --> 00:34:44.983
 the permission to uh to
 
 00:34:45.403 --> 00:34:47.266
 speak openly but also
 
 00:34:47.505 --> 00:34:48.847
 knowing what's expected and
 
 00:34:48.887 --> 00:34:50.268
 where the boundary is to
 
 00:34:50.347 --> 00:34:52.690
 not go past that that
 
 00:34:52.809 --> 00:34:54.510
 really helps people know
 
 00:34:54.530 --> 00:34:55.612
 what to expect which helps
 
 00:34:55.652 --> 00:34:56.773
 our nervous systems relax a
 
 00:34:56.793 --> 00:34:58.054
 little bit and then it does
 
 00:34:58.293 --> 00:34:59.235
 create the foundation for
 
 00:34:59.275 --> 00:35:00.096
 sense of belonging
 
 00:35:00.155 --> 00:35:01.916
 connection so I love that
 
 00:35:02.277 --> 00:35:03.757
 and of course the other um
 
 00:35:04.699 --> 00:35:05.539
 Trauma-informed spaces
 
 00:35:05.559 --> 00:35:06.500
 includes peer support,
 
 00:35:06.641 --> 00:35:08.922
 so that's encouraging people to connect,
 
 00:35:08.961 --> 00:35:10.402
 and that's what I do in my spaces.
 
 00:35:10.503 --> 00:35:12.105
 I say, hey,
 
 00:35:12.125 --> 00:35:13.204
 this is a space where we're
 
 00:35:13.244 --> 00:35:16.088
 here to connect with each other, not, hey,
 
 00:35:16.108 --> 00:35:16.788
 just come to this
 
 00:35:16.827 --> 00:35:18.789
 particular organization or this class,
 
 00:35:19.349 --> 00:35:20.291
 and you're going to listen
 
 00:35:20.311 --> 00:35:22.271
 to the person who's educating you,
 
 00:35:22.452 --> 00:35:23.333
 and there's no connections.
 
 00:35:23.393 --> 00:35:24.974
 Now that's appropriate in a
 
 00:35:25.014 --> 00:35:26.775
 workshop or a lecture or if
 
 00:35:26.795 --> 00:35:27.375
 you're listening to a
 
 00:35:27.414 --> 00:35:28.815
 podcast or something like that.
 
 00:35:29.135 --> 00:35:30.297
 But what I really think that
 
 00:35:30.317 --> 00:35:31.737
 we're seeking like really
 
 00:35:31.777 --> 00:35:33.318
 deeply is I think we're
 
 00:35:33.338 --> 00:35:35.280
 really seeking this space of connection.
 
 00:35:35.820 --> 00:35:37.661
 Like I want to go to a place
 
 00:35:37.721 --> 00:35:38.481
 where I can connect with
 
 00:35:38.541 --> 00:35:39.621
 other people that maybe I
 
 00:35:39.661 --> 00:35:43.003
 haven't met that it might be scary,
 
 00:35:43.063 --> 00:35:44.465
 but I want to learn more about them.
 
 00:35:44.864 --> 00:35:46.186
 And I want them to learn more about me.
 
 00:35:46.286 --> 00:35:47.146
 And I want to share what's
 
 00:35:47.166 --> 00:35:47.947
 going on in my life.
 
 00:35:47.987 --> 00:35:49.126
 I want to have an experience
 
 00:35:49.146 --> 00:35:49.748
 of connection.
 
 00:35:50.663 --> 00:35:51.623
 So yeah, that's that.
 
 00:35:51.684 --> 00:35:53.925
 And then collaboration is where we,
 
 00:35:54.184 --> 00:35:55.846
 as trauma-informed space facilitators,
 
 00:35:55.905 --> 00:35:58.188
 we hold inclusive space and
 
 00:35:58.228 --> 00:35:59.007
 supportive space.
 
 00:35:59.047 --> 00:35:59.869
 And we want to help people
 
 00:35:59.889 --> 00:36:01.510
 to get resources that they might need.
 
 00:36:01.550 --> 00:36:02.969
 Like, here's a really good book I read.
 
 00:36:03.010 --> 00:36:03.630
 Check that out.
 
 00:36:03.670 --> 00:36:04.831
 Or here's a cool podcast.
 
 00:36:04.911 --> 00:36:06.652
 Or hey, you might need some support.
 
 00:36:06.733 --> 00:36:07.373
 I see you're grieving.
 
 00:36:07.393 --> 00:36:08.393
 You just lost a loved one.
 
 00:36:08.454 --> 00:36:09.635
 I know a really good counselor.
 
 00:36:09.655 --> 00:36:10.614
 I'll give you her card.
 
 00:36:11.074 --> 00:36:12.076
 So those are the things that
 
 00:36:12.096 --> 00:36:13.657
 we offer in our space.
 
 00:36:14.117 --> 00:36:15.498
 And then, of course, number five,
 
 00:36:15.878 --> 00:36:18.159
 the biggest one is empowerment.
 
 00:36:18.820 --> 00:36:19.822
 I think that if you can
 
 00:36:19.942 --> 00:36:23.146
 enter a space that you can feel safe,
 
 00:36:23.927 --> 00:36:24.668
 you can feel that there's
 
 00:36:24.728 --> 00:36:25.489
 trust and there's
 
 00:36:25.509 --> 00:36:26.730
 transparency in that group.
 
 00:36:27.150 --> 00:36:28.413
 You get this peer support
 
 00:36:28.492 --> 00:36:29.594
 and you have a sense like I
 
 00:36:29.614 --> 00:36:31.115
 can collaborate with these people.
 
 00:36:32.501 --> 00:36:34.481
 I can grow because that's
 
 00:36:34.501 --> 00:36:35.762
 what the foundation is for growth.
 
 00:36:35.842 --> 00:36:37.822
 And if I can grow, I can feel empowered.
 
 00:36:38.342 --> 00:36:40.983
 And empowerment comes from
 
 00:36:41.463 --> 00:36:43.364
 facing things that are scary,
 
 00:36:43.884 --> 00:36:44.543
 leaning into your
 
 00:36:44.583 --> 00:36:45.965
 discomfort and having
 
 00:36:46.005 --> 00:36:46.824
 someone to hold your hand
 
 00:36:46.844 --> 00:36:47.824
 when you're needing some
 
 00:36:47.864 --> 00:36:50.286
 courage or bravery or motivation.
 
 00:36:50.786 --> 00:36:53.847
 That is what empowerment spaces cultivate.
 
 00:36:54.226 --> 00:36:55.347
 And that's why I love
 
 00:36:55.606 --> 00:36:57.307
 creating space for empowerment, right?
 
 00:36:58.617 --> 00:36:59.418
 So in general,
 
 00:36:59.559 --> 00:37:01.981
 I think the space that
 
 00:37:02.021 --> 00:37:03.963
 Firefly Hollow holds and
 
 00:37:04.023 --> 00:37:07.467
 even the spaces for classes, workshops,
 
 00:37:07.586 --> 00:37:08.847
 anything that I facilitate,
 
 00:37:09.449 --> 00:37:10.949
 I'm just really always
 
 00:37:10.969 --> 00:37:12.150
 looking to learn and grow.
 
 00:37:12.572 --> 00:37:14.193
 And that's what I also offer you,
 
 00:37:14.253 --> 00:37:15.934
 that being in community,
 
 00:37:16.295 --> 00:37:17.956
 being in a space with other people,
 
 00:37:18.077 --> 00:37:18.918
 we're always going to learn
 
 00:37:18.938 --> 00:37:20.639
 and grow because other people are
 
 00:37:21.579 --> 00:37:23.681
 offer reflections of ourselves,
 
 00:37:24.121 --> 00:37:25.581
 reflections and
 
 00:37:25.782 --> 00:37:26.663
 opportunities for us to
 
 00:37:26.722 --> 00:37:28.262
 evaluate how we communicate,
 
 00:37:28.643 --> 00:37:29.804
 how we don't communicate,
 
 00:37:30.204 --> 00:37:31.284
 what triggers us,
 
 00:37:31.485 --> 00:37:32.766
 what are our boundaries.
 
 00:37:33.306 --> 00:37:35.286
 These are all spaces that we
 
 00:37:35.327 --> 00:37:37.547
 can take the opportunity to
 
 00:37:37.648 --> 00:37:39.108
 look at if we can see it
 
 00:37:39.148 --> 00:37:41.210
 that way and play our role
 
 00:37:41.250 --> 00:37:43.391
 in community in that sense.
 
 00:37:44.010 --> 00:37:45.050
 so I'm going to move over
 
 00:37:45.211 --> 00:37:46.771
 into the healthy roles that
 
 00:37:46.791 --> 00:37:48.313
 we play in community now
 
 00:37:48.353 --> 00:37:49.733
 there's unhealthy roles
 
 00:37:49.793 --> 00:37:50.673
 right there's someone
 
 00:37:50.693 --> 00:37:51.893
 that's the gossip the
 
 00:37:51.934 --> 00:37:52.914
 someone that takes
 
 00:37:52.974 --> 00:37:54.594
 advantage of people there's
 
 00:37:54.635 --> 00:37:55.894
 some people that are in
 
 00:37:55.934 --> 00:37:58.836
 community that have um they
 
 00:37:58.916 --> 00:37:59.976
 don't help out they're the
 
 00:38:00.056 --> 00:38:00.757
 ones that are always like
 
 00:38:00.817 --> 00:38:01.998
 oh they're the dead they're
 
 00:38:02.018 --> 00:38:04.038
 the dead the weakest link
 
 00:38:04.057 --> 00:38:05.159
 or the person that's too
 
 00:38:05.219 --> 00:38:06.518
 lazy whatever and this all
 
 00:38:06.559 --> 00:38:08.599
 is going into gossip but
 
 00:38:08.659 --> 00:38:09.880
 why does gossip happen
 
 00:38:11.380 --> 00:38:12.420
 It happens because we don't
 
 00:38:12.501 --> 00:38:14.061
 have a culture that
 
 00:38:14.101 --> 00:38:16.302
 supports authentic connection,
 
 00:38:16.762 --> 00:38:18.242
 where we don't take things personally,
 
 00:38:18.262 --> 00:38:20.643
 and we actually have face to face talks,
 
 00:38:20.764 --> 00:38:21.764
 challenging talks,
 
 00:38:21.804 --> 00:38:22.744
 things that might not be
 
 00:38:22.804 --> 00:38:24.405
 comfortable to say to someone.
 
 00:38:25.045 --> 00:38:25.844
 But we don't always know
 
 00:38:25.864 --> 00:38:27.826
 what our needs are to actually be like,
 
 00:38:27.846 --> 00:38:29.186
 hey, this crossed my boundary,
 
 00:38:29.206 --> 00:38:29.925
 I want to tell you about
 
 00:38:29.965 --> 00:38:31.126
 how many feel uncomfortable.
 
 00:38:31.626 --> 00:38:32.586
 But when we do that,
 
 00:38:32.847 --> 00:38:33.967
 when we start to have a
 
 00:38:34.027 --> 00:38:35.108
 space where we can start to
 
 00:38:35.148 --> 00:38:36.088
 play around with
 
 00:38:36.568 --> 00:38:38.608
 having authentic direct communication.
 
 00:38:38.909 --> 00:38:39.369
 And of course,
 
 00:38:39.869 --> 00:38:41.469
 that supports personal empowerment,
 
 00:38:41.489 --> 00:38:42.710
 that supports our development,
 
 00:38:42.731 --> 00:38:45.733
 because that's a challenging thing to do.
 
 00:38:46.213 --> 00:38:47.293
 But when we can do that,
 
 00:38:48.074 --> 00:38:49.974
 we can totally foster a
 
 00:38:50.054 --> 00:38:51.034
 space where honest
 
 00:38:51.054 --> 00:38:53.436
 communication can happen.
 
 00:38:53.996 --> 00:38:56.898
 And then that supports deeper connection.
 
 00:38:57.438 --> 00:38:58.297
 In the years,
 
 00:38:58.498 --> 00:39:00.639
 having a diverse group of
 
 00:39:00.699 --> 00:39:03.440
 colleagues or staff at Firefly Hollow,
 
 00:39:04.507 --> 00:39:06.289
 especially with polarizing views.
 
 00:39:07.251 --> 00:39:08.851
 When we've been able to hold
 
 00:39:08.911 --> 00:39:10.293
 space and have direct
 
 00:39:10.333 --> 00:39:11.273
 communication about
 
 00:39:11.335 --> 00:39:12.675
 challenges or things that
 
 00:39:12.775 --> 00:39:13.896
 made us uncomfortable,
 
 00:39:14.978 --> 00:39:17.480
 we grow so much more deeply
 
 00:39:17.539 --> 00:39:19.561
 in our roots and we grow so
 
 00:39:19.601 --> 00:39:20.523
 much more deeply in our
 
 00:39:20.583 --> 00:39:22.385
 hearts and our connections to each other.
 
 00:39:23.146 --> 00:39:24.407
 It's too often I see people
 
 00:39:24.586 --> 00:39:26.208
 uproot themselves.
 
 00:39:26.748 --> 00:39:27.949
 People uproot themselves
 
 00:39:27.969 --> 00:39:29.851
 from a community or a space when
 
 00:39:29.931 --> 00:39:31.072
 they don't feel,
 
 00:39:31.253 --> 00:39:33.074
 they feel any sense I should say of,
 
 00:39:33.393 --> 00:39:34.534
 of not like of safety or
 
 00:39:34.554 --> 00:39:35.375
 they're offended.
 
 00:39:35.954 --> 00:39:36.875
 And instead of being able to
 
 00:39:36.894 --> 00:39:38.516
 have a conversation when
 
 00:39:38.536 --> 00:39:39.297
 they're not triggered,
 
 00:39:39.536 --> 00:39:40.757
 learning how to regulate
 
 00:39:40.777 --> 00:39:41.978
 themselves to communicate
 
 00:39:42.038 --> 00:39:43.039
 in a space that they're,
 
 00:39:43.358 --> 00:39:44.119
 the other person's not
 
 00:39:44.139 --> 00:39:44.980
 triggered to like that
 
 00:39:45.000 --> 00:39:46.739
 there's this ripe space for
 
 00:39:46.840 --> 00:39:49.061
 actual connection, right?
 
 00:39:49.081 --> 00:39:51.523
 When you can do that, it creates depth.
 
 00:39:52.063 --> 00:39:53.083
 It creates anchoring.
 
 00:39:53.164 --> 00:39:54.543
 It creates strength.
 
 00:39:55.144 --> 00:39:57.806
 And I think that we have such, um,
 
 00:39:59.793 --> 00:40:00.873
 The word is fragile.
 
 00:40:01.173 --> 00:40:02.855
 We have fragile community
 
 00:40:02.914 --> 00:40:04.815
 spaces because we haven't
 
 00:40:04.835 --> 00:40:06.115
 been taught or given the
 
 00:40:06.155 --> 00:40:07.476
 resources to regulate our
 
 00:40:07.516 --> 00:40:08.876
 nervous system during stress,
 
 00:40:09.458 --> 00:40:10.777
 to learn how to communicate
 
 00:40:10.978 --> 00:40:12.159
 and effectively communicate,
 
 00:40:12.518 --> 00:40:13.619
 and to understand when
 
 00:40:13.699 --> 00:40:14.981
 someone's not in a space of
 
 00:40:15.021 --> 00:40:15.981
 being able to be receptive
 
 00:40:16.021 --> 00:40:17.001
 to our communication.
 
 00:40:17.501 --> 00:40:18.402
 Because if we have all those
 
 00:40:18.442 --> 00:40:19.503
 factors lined up,
 
 00:40:20.182 --> 00:40:21.862
 we can go through these
 
 00:40:21.902 --> 00:40:24.324
 challenges as a community member,
 
 00:40:24.963 --> 00:40:25.804
 learn and grow,
 
 00:40:26.085 --> 00:40:27.425
 and then create a strength,
 
 00:40:27.704 --> 00:40:28.364
 a strength in that
 
 00:40:28.385 --> 00:40:29.664
 community that is like no other,
 
 00:40:29.744 --> 00:40:30.706
 a robustness.
 
 00:40:31.206 --> 00:40:32.585
 And this is what I have so
 
 00:40:32.606 --> 00:40:35.666
 much passion for teaching, for educating,
 
 00:40:35.726 --> 00:40:37.887
 for learning more myself, right?
 
 00:40:37.927 --> 00:40:39.708
 There's so much more to learn about this.
 
 00:40:40.108 --> 00:40:42.889
 So yes, so those are the, the, the,
 
 00:40:43.809 --> 00:40:44.952
 the things that we need to
 
 00:40:45.032 --> 00:40:45.894
 support that community
 
 00:40:45.934 --> 00:40:47.278
 space now let's talk about
 
 00:40:47.298 --> 00:40:48.422
 the healthy roles okay we
 
 00:40:48.461 --> 00:40:49.625
 talked about the unhealthy
 
 00:40:49.664 --> 00:40:50.547
 roles a little bit here
 
 00:40:51.769 --> 00:40:52.090
 One of the,
 
 00:40:52.190 --> 00:40:53.490
 I was looking at all these roles.
 
 00:40:53.530 --> 00:40:54.771
 So there's more than just
 
 00:40:54.831 --> 00:40:56.751
 the nine that I'm going to mention,
 
 00:40:57.311 --> 00:40:58.351
 but these are in general,
 
 00:40:58.391 --> 00:40:59.172
 you'll see this in a
 
 00:40:59.311 --> 00:41:01.193
 majority of organizations.
 
 00:41:01.213 --> 00:41:04.414
 So think about your workplace, your family,
 
 00:41:05.094 --> 00:41:07.594
 your any place that you do
 
 00:41:07.614 --> 00:41:09.295
 for like a club or maybe
 
 00:41:09.315 --> 00:41:10.695
 you're in a bowling team or something.
 
 00:41:11.036 --> 00:41:13.077
 Think about the different roles.
 
 00:41:13.376 --> 00:41:15.476
 Again, these are healthy roles,
 
 00:41:15.577 --> 00:41:17.297
 roles that we need to see in a community.
 
 00:41:18.137 --> 00:41:19.920
 And then think about in your community,
 
 00:41:20.340 --> 00:41:22.222
 are there any roles that are lacking?
 
 00:41:23.632 --> 00:41:24.632
 That's important too,
 
 00:41:25.032 --> 00:41:26.472
 to have a well-rounded community.
 
 00:41:26.512 --> 00:41:28.914
 We have a multiple people
 
 00:41:29.134 --> 00:41:31.155
 that play at least one of these roles.
 
 00:41:31.635 --> 00:41:32.135
 Many of our,
 
 00:41:32.335 --> 00:41:33.396
 you can think about yourself too.
 
 00:41:33.436 --> 00:41:34.476
 What role do you play in
 
 00:41:34.516 --> 00:41:35.717
 community that are related
 
 00:41:35.737 --> 00:41:36.456
 to these roles?
 
 00:41:36.916 --> 00:41:37.998
 But in general,
 
 00:41:38.297 --> 00:41:40.159
 we play one or more of these roles.
 
 00:41:40.338 --> 00:41:41.278
 Many of the times we play
 
 00:41:41.338 --> 00:41:43.280
 multiple roles of all these nine roles,
 
 00:41:43.400 --> 00:41:44.340
 I play eight of them.
 
 00:41:44.400 --> 00:41:46.501
 And I think that's why I had
 
 00:41:46.541 --> 00:41:48.061
 some sort of capacity to
 
 00:41:48.181 --> 00:41:50.362
 hold space enough that, okay, well,
 
 00:41:50.382 --> 00:41:51.302
 I don't have someone that's
 
 00:41:51.342 --> 00:41:52.103
 this role or that role,
 
 00:41:52.123 --> 00:41:53.344
 but I also do that too.
 
 00:41:53.784 --> 00:41:55.786
 so I can do that and gather people.
 
 00:41:55.806 --> 00:41:57.447
 All right, so here we are.
 
 00:41:57.487 --> 00:41:59.228
 So think about what role do you play?
 
 00:41:59.728 --> 00:42:01.188
 What role do you see in your community?
 
 00:42:01.349 --> 00:42:02.309
 And what roles do you not
 
 00:42:02.349 --> 00:42:03.130
 see in your community or
 
 00:42:03.150 --> 00:42:04.211
 space that are lacking that
 
 00:42:04.231 --> 00:42:05.411
 you need to create balance
 
 00:42:05.431 --> 00:42:06.293
 and harmony in your
 
 00:42:06.313 --> 00:42:07.474
 community or the
 
 00:42:07.514 --> 00:42:08.394
 organization that you're
 
 00:42:08.414 --> 00:42:10.896
 trying to create or up-level,
 
 00:42:10.956 --> 00:42:11.556
 I should say, too.
 
 00:42:13.083 --> 00:42:14.003
 The connector.
 
 00:42:14.344 --> 00:42:15.043
 So the connectors,
 
 00:42:15.083 --> 00:42:16.445
 people like they break the
 
 00:42:16.545 --> 00:42:17.186
 ice for people.
 
 00:42:17.565 --> 00:42:18.806
 They bring people together.
 
 00:42:18.847 --> 00:42:20.728
 They help forge new relationships.
 
 00:42:21.028 --> 00:42:22.849
 They're the matchmaker within the group.
 
 00:42:23.190 --> 00:42:24.911
 So this is someone that might be like, hey,
 
 00:42:24.931 --> 00:42:26.353
 I need to set you up with this person.
 
 00:42:26.693 --> 00:42:27.833
 They're the networker.
 
 00:42:28.054 --> 00:42:29.195
 They know a lot of people
 
 00:42:29.295 --> 00:42:31.016
 and they will also invite
 
 00:42:31.056 --> 00:42:32.938
 people to groups or events.
 
 00:42:33.617 --> 00:42:34.719
 They are a lot of times the
 
 00:42:34.778 --> 00:42:35.900
 initiator of things.
 
 00:42:36.340 --> 00:42:39.001
 So this is usually a social butterfly,
 
 00:42:39.382 --> 00:42:40.204
 but not always.
 
 00:42:40.224 --> 00:42:42.005
 They can be an introverted person as well.
 
 00:42:42.425 --> 00:42:44.387
 But they are the people that will say, hey,
 
 00:42:44.547 --> 00:42:46.909
 I think you might like this person or hey,
 
 00:42:47.329 --> 00:42:48.070
 what's your name?
 
 00:42:48.210 --> 00:42:49.050
 I want to introduce you to
 
 00:42:49.090 --> 00:42:50.172
 so and so over here.
 
 00:42:50.652 --> 00:42:52.153
 And that is so important.
 
 00:42:52.815 --> 00:42:54.996
 I have a neighbor that our
 
 00:42:55.036 --> 00:42:56.038
 neighborhood that I live in
 
 00:42:56.177 --> 00:42:57.059
 doesn't have a lot of
 
 00:42:57.119 --> 00:42:58.139
 connection and community.
 
 00:42:58.920 --> 00:43:00.300
 And there is one neighbor
 
 00:43:00.340 --> 00:43:02.681
 that is the connector for many of us.
 
 00:43:03.063 --> 00:43:03.963
 They're always saying, hey,
 
 00:43:03.983 --> 00:43:05.023
 that person down the street
 
 00:43:05.043 --> 00:43:05.884
 just did this.
 
 00:43:06.425 --> 00:43:07.786
 And isn't that great?
 
 00:43:07.925 --> 00:43:09.286
 And they are talking just
 
 00:43:09.327 --> 00:43:10.447
 positive things about the
 
 00:43:10.467 --> 00:43:12.387
 community and they're sharing around.
 
 00:43:12.829 --> 00:43:13.909
 And because they go up and
 
 00:43:13.929 --> 00:43:15.329
 they talk to people in the
 
 00:43:15.349 --> 00:43:17.070
 community instead of just
 
 00:43:17.431 --> 00:43:18.811
 walk by them or don't say
 
 00:43:18.851 --> 00:43:19.992
 hello or acknowledge them
 
 00:43:20.012 --> 00:43:20.994
 when they're walking their dog,
 
 00:43:21.833 --> 00:43:22.795
 they will say hello.
 
 00:43:23.474 --> 00:43:24.635
 and they'll talk to you and
 
 00:43:24.655 --> 00:43:25.715
 they'll talk to the mailman
 
 00:43:25.775 --> 00:43:27.096
 and they're just talking to everybody.
 
 00:43:27.677 --> 00:43:30.777
 And in this York PA area,
 
 00:43:31.137 --> 00:43:31.998
 because we don't have a lot
 
 00:43:32.018 --> 00:43:33.018
 of that connection people
 
 00:43:33.039 --> 00:43:33.958
 keep to themselves,
 
 00:43:34.298 --> 00:43:36.119
 that person is a godsend, this neighbor,
 
 00:43:36.260 --> 00:43:37.440
 for being able to create
 
 00:43:37.480 --> 00:43:38.920
 these connections and break the ice.
 
 00:43:39.481 --> 00:43:40.300
 And if we had more people
 
 00:43:40.320 --> 00:43:41.161
 that could do that,
 
 00:43:41.461 --> 00:43:42.382
 we might have this more
 
 00:43:42.461 --> 00:43:43.822
 open-hearted nature and a
 
 00:43:43.902 --> 00:43:45.842
 sense of wanting to say hi
 
 00:43:45.862 --> 00:43:47.123
 to that person and just
 
 00:43:47.244 --> 00:43:47.963
 learn about who they are.
 
 00:43:48.204 --> 00:43:48.664
 But again,
 
 00:43:48.704 --> 00:43:49.945
 not everybody plays that role of
 
 00:43:49.965 --> 00:43:50.465
 the connector.
 
 00:43:51.856 --> 00:43:53.097
 Number two is the listener.
 
 00:43:53.657 --> 00:43:54.577
 This is someone who provides
 
 00:43:54.777 --> 00:43:57.077
 emotional support by actively listening,
 
 00:43:57.757 --> 00:43:58.918
 also maybe offering a
 
 00:43:58.998 --> 00:44:00.759
 non-judgmental space,
 
 00:44:01.099 --> 00:44:01.898
 so a space where they can
 
 00:44:01.918 --> 00:44:03.639
 just listen to what you're having to say.
 
 00:44:04.059 --> 00:44:05.099
 This is also someone who's
 
 00:44:05.340 --> 00:44:06.739
 kind of the nurturer in a way,
 
 00:44:07.059 --> 00:44:11.521
 where they will provide support or advice,
 
 00:44:11.641 --> 00:44:12.760
 or if you're not well,
 
 00:44:13.121 --> 00:44:14.282
 they might support you in
 
 00:44:15.322 --> 00:44:16.282
 and need what you need.
 
 00:44:16.322 --> 00:44:17.182
 But most of the time,
 
 00:44:17.302 --> 00:44:19.262
 they are someone that just listens.
 
 00:44:19.362 --> 00:44:20.244
 They're a listener.
 
 00:44:20.784 --> 00:44:22.965
 They aren't always the talker, right?
 
 00:44:23.045 --> 00:44:24.144
 You always have in dynamics,
 
 00:44:24.164 --> 00:44:25.385
 the someone that talks a lot,
 
 00:44:25.766 --> 00:44:27.045
 and someone that just listens,
 
 00:44:27.126 --> 00:44:28.407
 and they need to go together,
 
 00:44:28.467 --> 00:44:29.867
 because two people that don't talk,
 
 00:44:30.306 --> 00:44:31.628
 that's just a dead air.
 
 00:44:31.708 --> 00:44:32.608
 And then two people that are
 
 00:44:32.648 --> 00:44:33.688
 talking consistently,
 
 00:44:34.128 --> 00:44:35.429
 that can get a little overwhelming.
 
 00:44:35.568 --> 00:44:36.530
 And a lot of times they're
 
 00:44:36.550 --> 00:44:37.690
 competing for who's talking.
 
 00:44:38.936 --> 00:44:40.956
 The organizer is someone in
 
 00:44:40.996 --> 00:44:42.918
 your family or your work or
 
 00:44:42.958 --> 00:44:44.338
 your group that keeps
 
 00:44:44.378 --> 00:44:46.000
 things structured and on time.
 
 00:44:46.500 --> 00:44:48.440
 They're the one that plans the events or,
 
 00:44:48.541 --> 00:44:48.701
 hey,
 
 00:44:48.721 --> 00:44:49.641
 when are we getting together for
 
 00:44:49.681 --> 00:44:50.282
 Christmas?
 
 00:44:50.362 --> 00:44:51.001
 What's the dinner?
 
 00:44:51.041 --> 00:44:52.063
 Who's bringing what?
 
 00:44:52.842 --> 00:44:53.664
 And they make sure people
 
 00:44:53.684 --> 00:44:55.043
 have regular activities to do,
 
 00:44:55.204 --> 00:44:56.425
 like to get involved with.
 
 00:44:57.146 --> 00:44:58.045
 This is someone who takes
 
 00:44:58.065 --> 00:44:59.927
 the lead in organizing duties.
 
 00:45:00.126 --> 00:45:01.967
 They can schedule and plan
 
 00:45:01.987 --> 00:45:03.148
 things around the group.
 
 00:45:03.869 --> 00:45:05.891
 And I know that sometimes if
 
 00:45:05.911 --> 00:45:06.974
 you don't have that person,
 
 00:45:07.353 --> 00:45:08.735
 you can be like like we
 
 00:45:08.755 --> 00:45:11.360
 have a family that since I
 
 00:45:11.539 --> 00:45:12.581
 most of the time am
 
 00:45:12.902 --> 00:45:15.425
 organizing and making structured planning,
 
 00:45:15.626 --> 00:45:16.306
 making structure and
 
 00:45:16.327 --> 00:45:17.809
 planning events for my business,
 
 00:45:18.208 --> 00:45:19.130
 that at the end of the day,
 
 00:45:19.670 --> 00:45:20.530
 I'm done doing that.
 
 00:45:20.630 --> 00:45:21.851
 Like I want to veg out.
 
 00:45:21.992 --> 00:45:22.952
 I don't want to plan family
 
 00:45:22.972 --> 00:45:24.092
 gatherings as well too.
 
 00:45:24.492 --> 00:45:25.472
 So there's been multiple
 
 00:45:25.512 --> 00:45:27.012
 times that I've gone on
 
 00:45:27.032 --> 00:45:28.293
 vacation with my family and
 
 00:45:28.333 --> 00:45:29.893
 I have five siblings, four siblings.
 
 00:45:29.914 --> 00:45:30.233
 I'm sorry.
 
 00:45:30.253 --> 00:45:30.853
 I'm one of five.
 
 00:45:31.414 --> 00:45:32.534
 And so we go say we're going
 
 00:45:32.554 --> 00:45:35.175
 to Florida and we get there
 
 00:45:35.235 --> 00:45:36.155
 and I'm just happy to just
 
 00:45:36.195 --> 00:45:36.875
 not do anything.
 
 00:45:36.914 --> 00:45:37.135
 Right.
 
 00:45:37.436 --> 00:45:38.615
 But then there's some people that
 
 00:45:39.255 --> 00:45:40.956
 are less likely to,
 
 00:45:40.976 --> 00:45:42.056
 they're more likely wanting
 
 00:45:42.097 --> 00:45:44.438
 to do things and be active, which is fine,
 
 00:45:44.978 --> 00:45:46.179
 but no one organizes it.
 
 00:45:46.358 --> 00:45:47.039
 And then all of a sudden
 
 00:45:47.059 --> 00:45:48.340
 people start getting frustrated.
 
 00:45:48.380 --> 00:45:49.679
 Like, what are we doing?
 
 00:45:50.420 --> 00:45:51.440
 Did anyone make plans?
 
 00:45:51.460 --> 00:45:52.501
 Wait, where are they going?
 
 00:45:52.742 --> 00:45:54.461
 And there's not any cohesiveness.
 
 00:45:54.521 --> 00:45:56.362
 It's like the herd is going
 
 00:45:56.382 --> 00:45:57.304
 in all different directions.
 
 00:45:57.324 --> 00:45:58.063
 They don't really know where
 
 00:45:58.083 --> 00:45:59.043
 to go because they're not
 
 00:45:59.123 --> 00:46:00.385
 used to being in that big group.
 
 00:46:01.125 --> 00:46:02.545
 And they don't have the organizer to say,
 
 00:46:02.585 --> 00:46:03.806
 hey, guys, let's go to this place.
 
 00:46:03.827 --> 00:46:04.907
 Or do you guys want to do this?
 
 00:46:04.947 --> 00:46:05.728
 Let's take a vote.
 
 00:46:06.047 --> 00:46:07.068
 And then organizing and
 
 00:46:07.307 --> 00:46:08.489
 taking the troops to this
 
 00:46:08.548 --> 00:46:09.829
 restaurant or this location.
 
 00:46:10.289 --> 00:46:11.510
 So that's something that I
 
 00:46:11.590 --> 00:46:14.751
 see in my small familial community,
 
 00:46:14.871 --> 00:46:15.632
 my family.
 
 00:46:16.233 --> 00:46:18.494
 And there is a lack of organizer.
 
 00:46:18.673 --> 00:46:19.134
 And of course,
 
 00:46:19.153 --> 00:46:20.394
 sometimes I'll step into the role.
 
 00:46:20.414 --> 00:46:21.896
 And sometimes I'm like, nope, guys,
 
 00:46:22.076 --> 00:46:22.576
 I am done.
 
 00:46:23.516 --> 00:46:25.617
 That's my boundary for the vacation.
 
 00:46:26.706 --> 00:46:28.068
 Number four is the motivator.
 
 00:46:29.028 --> 00:46:31.610
 This person encourages others,
 
 00:46:32.130 --> 00:46:33.851
 offers positive reinforcement,
 
 00:46:34.012 --> 00:46:34.831
 and helps others stay
 
 00:46:34.851 --> 00:46:35.952
 committed to their personal
 
 00:46:35.992 --> 00:46:38.034
 growth or their goals or the community.
 
 00:46:38.494 --> 00:46:39.775
 So this is the person that
 
 00:46:39.876 --> 00:46:41.297
 gets up and inspires people
 
 00:46:41.336 --> 00:46:43.277
 to take action, motivates people,
 
 00:46:44.179 --> 00:46:45.480
 and they're pretty upbeat usually.
 
 00:46:45.519 --> 00:46:47.380
 They're like the cheerleader of the group.
 
 00:46:47.541 --> 00:46:48.621
 And so that's really important.
 
 00:46:48.981 --> 00:46:50.543
 This person also tends to be
 
 00:46:50.643 --> 00:46:53.045
 uplifting and inspirational or positive.
 
 00:46:53.405 --> 00:46:54.405
 And so if there are negative
 
 00:46:54.445 --> 00:46:55.226
 nancies in the group,
 
 00:46:55.246 --> 00:46:56.327
 which we always have them,
 
 00:46:57.387 --> 00:46:58.628
 You know, it's part of it.
 
 00:46:58.688 --> 00:47:00.349
 We'd love to have that be in
 
 00:47:00.369 --> 00:47:01.268
 a healthy organization.
 
 00:47:01.309 --> 00:47:03.130
 We support someone not being negative,
 
 00:47:03.429 --> 00:47:04.650
 but sometimes we have to
 
 00:47:04.849 --> 00:47:05.731
 share what's really going
 
 00:47:05.811 --> 00:47:07.331
 on and we are negative and it's okay.
 
 00:47:07.570 --> 00:47:09.132
 But someone that's does it all the time.
 
 00:47:09.291 --> 00:47:10.413
 If you have someone that is
 
 00:47:10.472 --> 00:47:12.152
 a motivator and optimist,
 
 00:47:12.432 --> 00:47:13.673
 some that's always offering
 
 00:47:13.733 --> 00:47:14.773
 encouraging words and
 
 00:47:14.813 --> 00:47:16.414
 uplifting the space that
 
 00:47:16.454 --> 00:47:18.155
 can be supportive and can
 
 00:47:18.175 --> 00:47:19.755
 be counterbalancing and
 
 00:47:19.795 --> 00:47:21.097
 create more harmony in a group.
 
 00:47:22.588 --> 00:47:23.708
 The nurturer is someone that
 
 00:47:23.768 --> 00:47:25.170
 creates warmth.
 
 00:47:25.771 --> 00:47:26.572
 They're the person that
 
 00:47:26.751 --> 00:47:29.896
 helps you feel cozy and
 
 00:47:30.115 --> 00:47:31.777
 nourished and welcomed in
 
 00:47:31.797 --> 00:47:32.918
 the group or the community.
 
 00:47:33.378 --> 00:47:35.201
 So they might give food or
 
 00:47:35.260 --> 00:47:36.561
 offer practical help like
 
 00:47:36.621 --> 00:47:38.483
 decorating or something
 
 00:47:38.523 --> 00:47:40.686
 that helps the space feel
 
 00:47:40.806 --> 00:47:41.967
 nourished or the people
 
 00:47:42.007 --> 00:47:44.831
 feel nourished and seen and validated.
 
 00:47:45.231 --> 00:47:46.612
 So, oh, I saw that you were cold.
 
 00:47:46.632 --> 00:47:47.713
 Would you like a blanket?
 
 00:47:48.233 --> 00:47:50.275
 And that's one thing that I
 
 00:47:50.356 --> 00:47:52.777
 love hosting individuals in my home.
 
 00:47:53.418 --> 00:47:54.400
 It's something that I think
 
 00:47:54.800 --> 00:47:56.481
 it's been in the family of like,
 
 00:47:56.501 --> 00:47:57.702
 let's have people over.
 
 00:47:58.063 --> 00:47:58.824
 I want to make sure that
 
 00:47:58.844 --> 00:48:01.005
 there's candles and it smells good.
 
 00:48:01.326 --> 00:48:02.347
 And hey, are you cold?
 
 00:48:02.407 --> 00:48:03.648
 Or hey, can I get you a drink?
 
 00:48:03.947 --> 00:48:05.789
 Like I am absolutely that role.
 
 00:48:05.929 --> 00:48:07.871
 And like I said, I'm all of these roles,
 
 00:48:07.891 --> 00:48:08.931
 which is really interesting.
 
 00:48:09.532 --> 00:48:11.172
 You might be resonating with multiple ones,
 
 00:48:11.253 --> 00:48:13.173
 but I am that person that breaks the ice.
 
 00:48:13.273 --> 00:48:14.014
 I am the connector.
 
 00:48:14.394 --> 00:48:15.155
 I am the networker.
 
 00:48:15.235 --> 00:48:16.556
 I'm the person that listens
 
 00:48:16.576 --> 00:48:17.896
 and provides emotional support.
 
 00:48:18.458 --> 00:48:19.657
 I am also the person that
 
 00:48:19.777 --> 00:48:21.278
 organizes and structures things.
 
 00:48:21.559 --> 00:48:23.199
 I'm also the person that
 
 00:48:23.260 --> 00:48:25.302
 encourages positive reinforcement.
 
 00:48:25.422 --> 00:48:26.242
 I am the motivator.
 
 00:48:26.342 --> 00:48:27.163
 I am the person of
 
 00:48:27.443 --> 00:48:28.324
 encouragement and the
 
 00:48:28.364 --> 00:48:29.483
 inspirational leader who
 
 00:48:29.523 --> 00:48:30.744
 supports people to continue
 
 00:48:30.764 --> 00:48:31.746
 to empower themselves.
 
 00:48:32.226 --> 00:48:33.085
 And of course, the nurturer.
 
 00:48:34.206 --> 00:48:35.527
 It also makes good for a
 
 00:48:35.547 --> 00:48:36.527
 good massage therapist.
 
 00:48:36.547 --> 00:48:39.570
 So I'm like, okay, how about this music?
 
 00:48:39.610 --> 00:48:40.489
 Do you like this music?
 
 00:48:40.630 --> 00:48:42.190
 Is the temperature of the room okay?
 
 00:48:42.471 --> 00:48:43.592
 You know, how about that blanket?
 
 00:48:43.612 --> 00:48:44.672
 Do you want a bigger blanket?
 
 00:48:44.692 --> 00:48:45.373
 How about the bolster?
 
 00:48:45.393 --> 00:48:45.952
 Do I need to move it?
 
 00:48:46.092 --> 00:48:47.152
 This is all about creating
 
 00:48:47.233 --> 00:48:49.014
 safety and comfort for the
 
 00:48:49.034 --> 00:48:49.815
 nervous system through that
 
 00:48:49.894 --> 00:48:50.855
 warmth and nurturing.
 
 00:48:51.414 --> 00:48:53.036
 So that's number five.
 
 00:48:53.076 --> 00:48:54.237
 Number six is the teacher.
 
 00:48:55.902 --> 00:48:57.903
 This person shares knowledge, skills,
 
 00:48:58.023 --> 00:48:59.125
 or wisdom to help people
 
 00:48:59.144 --> 00:49:00.264
 grow and understand more
 
 00:49:00.286 --> 00:49:01.806
 about themselves and the world.
 
 00:49:02.266 --> 00:49:03.507
 So they would lead like a
 
 00:49:03.547 --> 00:49:05.028
 workshop or let me teach
 
 00:49:05.048 --> 00:49:06.230
 you guys how to fish,
 
 00:49:06.891 --> 00:49:07.650
 someone in your family that
 
 00:49:07.670 --> 00:49:08.791
 wants to teach something
 
 00:49:08.851 --> 00:49:10.914
 like a skill or provide
 
 00:49:10.954 --> 00:49:13.615
 mentorship to those in need.
 
 00:49:13.635 --> 00:49:14.476
 That's myself as well.
 
 00:49:14.577 --> 00:49:15.217
 I am a teacher.
 
 00:49:15.418 --> 00:49:18.539
 So beautiful to have that as well.
 
 00:49:18.639 --> 00:49:19.380
 I love being a teacher.
 
 00:49:20.081 --> 00:49:21.181
 The peacemaker.
 
 00:49:22.182 --> 00:49:24.045
 I have a lot of these people in my family.
 
 00:49:24.405 --> 00:49:26.387
 So these people mediate conflict.
 
 00:49:26.628 --> 00:49:27.668
 They promote harmony.
 
 00:49:27.809 --> 00:49:28.889
 They ensure the community
 
 00:49:28.909 --> 00:49:30.871
 stays safe and having this
 
 00:49:30.931 --> 00:49:32.034
 respectful environment.
 
 00:49:32.454 --> 00:49:33.976
 We may need more peacemakers
 
 00:49:34.016 --> 00:49:34.695
 in this world.
 
 00:49:35.016 --> 00:49:36.257
 We may need more people that
 
 00:49:36.297 --> 00:49:39.762
 can hold a space of objective peace.
 
 00:49:40.262 --> 00:49:42.143
 perspectives and be able to
 
 00:49:42.262 --> 00:49:43.844
 be in the middle and
 
 00:49:43.884 --> 00:49:44.824
 helping more people who
 
 00:49:44.864 --> 00:49:46.445
 can't see eye to eye who
 
 00:49:46.485 --> 00:49:47.686
 are on other ends of the
 
 00:49:47.726 --> 00:49:48.786
 spectrum of values or
 
 00:49:48.806 --> 00:49:51.469
 beliefs or opinions have
 
 00:49:51.528 --> 00:49:53.110
 this space of peace that
 
 00:49:53.130 --> 00:49:54.070
 they can actually maybe
 
 00:49:54.351 --> 00:49:56.592
 foster connection and
 
 00:49:56.672 --> 00:49:57.311
 especially when there's
 
 00:49:57.351 --> 00:49:58.893
 disharmony and so I think
 
 00:49:58.952 --> 00:49:59.594
 if you're out there and
 
 00:49:59.614 --> 00:50:00.954
 you're a peacemaker you
 
 00:50:00.994 --> 00:50:02.235
 might consider yourself oh
 
 00:50:02.335 --> 00:50:03.275
 I'm the quiet one
 
 00:50:03.516 --> 00:50:04.617
 but I am here to like help
 
 00:50:04.637 --> 00:50:06.278
 people calm down and I help
 
 00:50:06.318 --> 00:50:07.420
 them to connect or help
 
 00:50:07.460 --> 00:50:08.742
 them to communicate or I
 
 00:50:08.762 --> 00:50:10.764
 just create an environment of peace.
 
 00:50:11.740 --> 00:50:13.902
 I cannot tell you how much
 
 00:50:13.943 --> 00:50:15.463
 at this time with the
 
 00:50:15.523 --> 00:50:17.905
 imbalance that we see in the disharmony,
 
 00:50:17.965 --> 00:50:19.246
 how much your role is needed.
 
 00:50:19.786 --> 00:50:20.686
 All of these roles are
 
 00:50:20.867 --> 00:50:22.148
 equally as important.
 
 00:50:22.527 --> 00:50:23.728
 And at some time in our
 
 00:50:23.789 --> 00:50:25.349
 individual groups and the
 
 00:50:25.389 --> 00:50:27.510
 collective group, right, as humans,
 
 00:50:27.831 --> 00:50:29.472
 we have disharmony in the
 
 00:50:29.512 --> 00:50:31.032
 different roles that are played.
 
 00:50:31.333 --> 00:50:32.193
 And I would say that right
 
 00:50:32.233 --> 00:50:33.335
 now there's disharmony and
 
 00:50:33.434 --> 00:50:34.956
 a lot of need for the peacemaker role.
 
 00:50:36.666 --> 00:50:37.827
 The innovator is someone who
 
 00:50:37.847 --> 00:50:40.349
 brings fresh ideas, solutions,
 
 00:50:40.409 --> 00:50:41.849
 and creativity to the community.
 
 00:50:41.909 --> 00:50:43.510
 These are the people that go
 
 00:50:43.610 --> 00:50:46.192
 out into the world, they learn new things,
 
 00:50:46.231 --> 00:50:48.333
 whether it's in the online space,
 
 00:50:48.773 --> 00:50:51.014
 or they learn new information from books,
 
 00:50:51.235 --> 00:50:52.295
 or they travel and they
 
 00:50:52.315 --> 00:50:53.876
 wanna come share experiences, like,
 
 00:50:53.916 --> 00:50:55.757
 look at this new gadget that I got.
 
 00:50:56.197 --> 00:50:57.398
 Look at this new way I can
 
 00:50:57.498 --> 00:50:59.440
 solve to cut up this avocado.
 
 00:51:00.360 --> 00:51:01.820
 Your parents, your friends, your family,
 
 00:51:01.920 --> 00:51:03.400
 someone may play this role
 
 00:51:03.822 --> 00:51:04.501
 where they bring these
 
 00:51:04.581 --> 00:51:05.762
 ideas to you that you never
 
 00:51:05.802 --> 00:51:06.402
 thought about.
 
 00:51:06.543 --> 00:51:08.264
 They're like, whoa, that's pretty cool.
 
 00:51:08.864 --> 00:51:10.204
 They could also suggest new
 
 00:51:10.304 --> 00:51:11.625
 ideas or activities for
 
 00:51:11.644 --> 00:51:12.565
 your community to do.
 
 00:51:13.405 --> 00:51:16.067
 And I think that we need innovators,
 
 00:51:16.507 --> 00:51:17.666
 people who are able to
 
 00:51:17.706 --> 00:51:19.648
 bring new solutions to old problems.
 
 00:51:20.047 --> 00:51:21.047
 So innovators and
 
 00:51:21.088 --> 00:51:22.547
 peacemakers work together
 
 00:51:22.608 --> 00:51:24.409
 out there because we can create,
 
 00:51:24.829 --> 00:51:26.128
 when we create safe space
 
 00:51:26.188 --> 00:51:27.969
 in this environment of belonging,
 
 00:51:28.349 --> 00:51:29.269
 we can create the
 
 00:51:29.329 --> 00:51:30.030
 opportunity for the
 
 00:51:30.050 --> 00:51:31.769
 innovators to shine and say, hey,
 
 00:51:32.050 --> 00:51:32.771
 it's safe enough for me to
 
 00:51:32.791 --> 00:51:34.731
 share these new ideas in the group here.
 
 00:51:34.771 --> 00:51:35.630
 No one's going to belittle
 
 00:51:35.650 --> 00:51:37.072
 me or make fun of me or judge me.
 
 00:51:37.351 --> 00:51:38.012
 I want to show this really
 
 00:51:38.052 --> 00:51:38.751
 cool thing I learned.
 
 00:51:38.771 --> 00:51:39.871
 It might be a little bit
 
 00:51:39.931 --> 00:51:41.773
 different and weird, but let me tell you.
 
 00:51:42.293 --> 00:51:43.373
 And that's something that we
 
 00:51:43.414 --> 00:51:44.474
 really do need because we
 
 00:51:44.514 --> 00:51:45.956
 have some really long
 
 00:51:46.416 --> 00:51:47.496
 standing problems that have
 
 00:51:47.516 --> 00:51:49.498
 been in our culture and all
 
 00:51:49.538 --> 00:51:50.938
 the systems for many, many, many, many,
 
 00:51:50.978 --> 00:51:51.498
 many years.
 
 00:51:51.599 --> 00:51:52.519
 And it's time for some new
 
 00:51:52.579 --> 00:51:54.460
 ideas and talking about and
 
 00:51:54.481 --> 00:51:55.422
 sharing those ideas is the
 
 00:51:55.461 --> 00:51:56.623
 first step to implementing them.
 
 00:51:58.463 --> 00:51:59.826
 And number nine,
 
 00:52:00.326 --> 00:52:02.909
 number nine is the anchor.
 
 00:52:03.349 --> 00:52:04.891
 This is the person in your
 
 00:52:04.931 --> 00:52:06.373
 community or in your family,
 
 00:52:06.413 --> 00:52:08.054
 in your space that provides
 
 00:52:08.114 --> 00:52:10.257
 stability and consistency.
 
 00:52:10.657 --> 00:52:11.978
 They are always showing up,
 
 00:52:12.458 --> 00:52:13.719
 they're always reliable,
 
 00:52:13.981 --> 00:52:15.481
 and they're usually always there.
 
 00:52:16.436 --> 00:52:18.980
 This individual creates so
 
 00:52:19.079 --> 00:52:20.420
 much sense of safety
 
 00:52:20.922 --> 00:52:22.824
 because we as human beings
 
 00:52:23.143 --> 00:52:24.945
 like consistency.
 
 00:52:25.487 --> 00:52:26.367
 Maybe we don't, we like it.
 
 00:52:26.387 --> 00:52:27.088
 Maybe we like to have
 
 00:52:27.849 --> 00:52:29.190
 different options and choices,
 
 00:52:29.251 --> 00:52:30.271
 but our nervous systems
 
 00:52:30.411 --> 00:52:32.233
 like predictability and consistency.
 
 00:52:32.653 --> 00:52:33.755
 We want to know when we wake
 
 00:52:33.914 --> 00:52:35.536
 up in the morning that when
 
 00:52:35.576 --> 00:52:36.436
 we put our feet on the
 
 00:52:36.456 --> 00:52:37.197
 ground that gravity is
 
 00:52:37.217 --> 00:52:37.836
 going to still work.
 
 00:52:38.358 --> 00:52:40.338
 We want to know where our clothing are,
 
 00:52:40.679 --> 00:52:42.260
 where do we put our shoes, our keys.
 
 00:52:42.679 --> 00:52:44.081
 We don't always put it in the same place,
 
 00:52:44.121 --> 00:52:44.661
 but when we have
 
 00:52:44.721 --> 00:52:45.782
 consistency and we know
 
 00:52:46.222 --> 00:52:47.382
 every day when I come home from work,
 
 00:52:47.402 --> 00:52:49.784
 I put my keys here, there they are,
 
 00:52:50.204 --> 00:52:51.164
 it's less stressful,
 
 00:52:51.425 --> 00:52:52.246
 and our nervous systems can
 
 00:52:52.385 --> 00:52:53.646
 feel more together.
 
 00:52:54.226 --> 00:52:56.307
 So individuals who are the anchor,
 
 00:52:56.748 --> 00:52:58.550
 they are here to help create healthy,
 
 00:52:58.889 --> 00:52:59.951
 balanced community,
 
 00:53:00.030 --> 00:53:01.632
 especially where people feel supported.
 
 00:53:02.552 --> 00:53:03.552
 stable and secure,
 
 00:53:03.713 --> 00:53:04.994
 especially when there's upheaval.
 
 00:53:05.494 --> 00:53:06.594
 And at this time in the world,
 
 00:53:06.653 --> 00:53:07.815
 I think individuals who can
 
 00:53:07.855 --> 00:53:09.556
 be calm and provide that
 
 00:53:10.076 --> 00:53:11.637
 consistency and dependability,
 
 00:53:11.657 --> 00:53:12.777
 that they're always there,
 
 00:53:13.458 --> 00:53:14.438
 that can help our nervous
 
 00:53:14.458 --> 00:53:15.239
 systems even more.
 
 00:53:15.278 --> 00:53:16.059
 Like no matter what,
 
 00:53:16.440 --> 00:53:17.561
 you were always there.
 
 00:53:18.907 --> 00:53:19.969
 And I will give a shout out
 
 00:53:20.009 --> 00:53:21.791
 to one of our dearly
 
 00:53:21.811 --> 00:53:23.891
 beloved massage therapists, Erin Musick,
 
 00:53:23.931 --> 00:53:25.653
 who recently passed away suddenly,
 
 00:53:25.813 --> 00:53:26.554
 unexpectedly.
 
 00:53:27.175 --> 00:53:29.898
 And she was the person in the community,
 
 00:53:30.577 --> 00:53:32.400
 our community, that is still,
 
 00:53:32.440 --> 00:53:34.061
 I will say in spirit, the anchor.
 
 00:53:34.360 --> 00:53:35.663
 So she was the anchor for us
 
 00:53:35.702 --> 00:53:37.063
 when she was here in the flesh.
 
 00:53:37.443 --> 00:53:39.465
 She was always there, always reliable,
 
 00:53:39.565 --> 00:53:40.706
 always showing up and there
 
 00:53:40.726 --> 00:53:41.447
 when you needed her.
 
 00:53:42.208 --> 00:53:44.248
 And that's always,
 
 00:53:44.268 --> 00:53:45.429
 she was also the nurturer too.
 
 00:53:45.449 --> 00:53:45.708
 Of course,
 
 00:53:45.728 --> 00:53:47.250
 she always brought us things and
 
 00:53:47.269 --> 00:53:48.289
 made us soup and made,
 
 00:53:48.309 --> 00:53:49.449
 she made amazing apple butter.
 
 00:53:49.769 --> 00:53:50.851
 She was just an amazing woman.
 
 00:53:51.150 --> 00:53:53.670
 And the anchor of a human being,
 
 00:53:53.811 --> 00:53:56.492
 if you have that in your personality,
 
 00:53:56.552 --> 00:53:57.371
 or if you're missing that
 
 00:53:57.391 --> 00:53:58.052
 in your community,
 
 00:53:58.452 --> 00:53:59.293
 those are things that are
 
 00:53:59.472 --> 00:54:02.494
 huge because they create the, the,
 
 00:54:02.634 --> 00:54:04.817
 foundation to have the roots grow.
 
 00:54:05.277 --> 00:54:07.420
 If you have multiple
 
 00:54:07.460 --> 00:54:09.181
 different roles in your
 
 00:54:09.202 --> 00:54:09.963
 community or group,
 
 00:54:09.983 --> 00:54:11.264
 but you don't have a group
 
 00:54:11.304 --> 00:54:13.047
 of people consistently that are coming,
 
 00:54:13.768 --> 00:54:15.309
 like maybe you have a group
 
 00:54:15.329 --> 00:54:16.532
 of thirty people, right?
 
 00:54:16.771 --> 00:54:17.793
 But every time you meet,
 
 00:54:17.813 --> 00:54:19.114
 maybe they're all different people.
 
 00:54:19.275 --> 00:54:20.175
 And maybe some of them come
 
 00:54:20.215 --> 00:54:21.635
 back every couple weeks, right?
 
 00:54:22.275 --> 00:54:23.635
 If you don't have a good
 
 00:54:23.936 --> 00:54:25.097
 quarter of that group,
 
 00:54:25.117 --> 00:54:26.916
 five or six people that are the same,
 
 00:54:27.097 --> 00:54:28.958
 that every week they come, every month,
 
 00:54:28.978 --> 00:54:30.338
 whatever gathering it is, they come,
 
 00:54:30.398 --> 00:54:30.617
 right?
 
 00:54:31.117 --> 00:54:32.318
 It's going to feel chaotic.
 
 00:54:32.378 --> 00:54:33.278
 It's going to feel that
 
 00:54:33.298 --> 00:54:34.199
 there's never a sense of
 
 00:54:34.259 --> 00:54:35.579
 consistency and stability
 
 00:54:35.639 --> 00:54:36.420
 and reliability.
 
 00:54:36.920 --> 00:54:38.380
 And that, to our human nervous systems,
 
 00:54:38.501 --> 00:54:40.041
 doesn't create a safe space.
 
 00:54:40.402 --> 00:54:40.842
 And again,
 
 00:54:42.023 --> 00:54:44.184
 if we don't have these roles in a group,
 
 00:54:44.423 --> 00:54:45.525
 if we don't have these
 
 00:54:45.605 --> 00:54:47.425
 foundations for safer spaces,
 
 00:54:47.925 --> 00:54:51.827
 then we as humans may continue to devolve,
 
 00:54:51.889 --> 00:54:53.989
 I could say, or evolve past.
 
 00:54:54.030 --> 00:54:57.211
 I'll say evolve away from connection,
 
 00:54:57.711 --> 00:54:59.693
 away from and into our
 
 00:54:59.753 --> 00:55:01.074
 technological lives,
 
 00:55:01.373 --> 00:55:01.813
 where we're going to
 
 00:55:01.833 --> 00:55:02.554
 continue to see these
 
 00:55:02.594 --> 00:55:03.474
 health issues that are
 
 00:55:03.494 --> 00:55:04.775
 related to loneliness.
 
 00:55:05.356 --> 00:55:06.516
 And if it's not safe to
 
 00:55:06.556 --> 00:55:07.536
 enter a space or even we
 
 00:55:07.717 --> 00:55:08.918
 enter into a community and
 
 00:55:08.958 --> 00:55:09.699
 these roles are not
 
 00:55:09.759 --> 00:55:11.739
 balanced or they're non-existent,
 
 00:55:12.240 --> 00:55:13.061
 it's going to really just
 
 00:55:13.081 --> 00:55:14.161
 continue to fall apart.
 
 00:55:14.541 --> 00:55:15.282
 So if you're someone out
 
 00:55:15.302 --> 00:55:16.503
 there that has held a space
 
 00:55:16.902 --> 00:55:17.903
 or you are someone that
 
 00:55:18.083 --> 00:55:20.885
 wants advice or guidance to
 
 00:55:21.126 --> 00:55:23.047
 look at the space, look at the space
 
 00:55:24.148 --> 00:55:25.228
 the energy of the space.
 
 00:55:25.248 --> 00:55:26.009
 That's one of the things I
 
 00:55:26.048 --> 00:55:27.090
 feel so passionate about,
 
 00:55:27.409 --> 00:55:28.670
 because what more can we do
 
 00:55:28.710 --> 00:55:31.012
 in the world than cultivate spaces,
 
 00:55:31.231 --> 00:55:32.052
 whether it's at work,
 
 00:55:32.132 --> 00:55:33.193
 so workplace wellness,
 
 00:55:33.253 --> 00:55:35.313
 whether it's for your individual family.
 
 00:55:35.914 --> 00:55:37.275
 This is why we do wellness parties.
 
 00:55:37.295 --> 00:55:39.096
 This is why we do gatherings and say,
 
 00:55:39.115 --> 00:55:40.097
 let us come into your home
 
 00:55:40.137 --> 00:55:41.077
 and do a massage party,
 
 00:55:41.097 --> 00:55:42.177
 or let me do group readings
 
 00:55:42.217 --> 00:55:43.378
 as a medium for your friends.
 
 00:55:43.659 --> 00:55:44.559
 We'll just do our readings.
 
 00:55:44.599 --> 00:55:45.018
 That's fun,
 
 00:55:45.039 --> 00:55:46.599
 because some people talking to
 
 00:55:46.719 --> 00:55:48.181
 their past loved ones isn't
 
 00:55:48.221 --> 00:55:49.322
 necessarily connected for them.
 
 00:55:49.362 --> 00:55:50.382
 It's not something that's
 
 00:55:50.621 --> 00:55:51.623
 not good for their nervous system.
 
 00:55:51.643 --> 00:55:52.302
 They don't like that,
 
 00:55:52.342 --> 00:55:53.344
 depending on their belief system.
 
 00:55:53.603 --> 00:55:54.224
 But some people are like,
 
 00:55:54.284 --> 00:55:55.324
 I want to learn about my aura.
 
 00:55:55.344 --> 00:55:55.985
 That's fun.
 
 00:55:56.025 --> 00:55:57.085
 That seems safe, right?
 
 00:55:57.585 --> 00:55:58.786
 And these are all ways that
 
 00:55:58.806 --> 00:55:59.987
 we can create connection.
 
 00:56:00.266 --> 00:56:02.047
 Because one of the things I always say,
 
 00:56:02.327 --> 00:56:03.268
 being a medium,
 
 00:56:03.768 --> 00:56:05.688
 is if you are looking and
 
 00:56:05.929 --> 00:56:07.989
 sharing in a space that
 
 00:56:08.210 --> 00:56:09.951
 you're being the truth of who you are,
 
 00:56:10.530 --> 00:56:12.311
 you can create this sense
 
 00:56:12.552 --> 00:56:16.052
 of safety in the group of saying,
 
 00:56:16.072 --> 00:56:16.934
 this is actually...
 
 00:56:18.186 --> 00:56:20.148
 who I really am and what
 
 00:56:20.228 --> 00:56:22.431
 more of a truth bomb to be
 
 00:56:22.490 --> 00:56:25.092
 dropped on you than someone saying, hey,
 
 00:56:25.293 --> 00:56:26.793
 your aura is these colors
 
 00:56:26.835 --> 00:56:27.534
 and this is what it means
 
 00:56:27.554 --> 00:56:28.536
 about your personality.
 
 00:56:29.036 --> 00:56:29.916
 And I think for me,
 
 00:56:31.057 --> 00:56:32.518
 when I feel seen and heard
 
 00:56:32.940 --> 00:56:34.081
 when I enter a new space
 
 00:56:34.141 --> 00:56:35.561
 and someone can actually see who I am,
 
 00:56:35.621 --> 00:56:37.103
 not the facade or the
 
 00:56:37.143 --> 00:56:38.744
 fearful mask we put on
 
 00:56:38.764 --> 00:56:39.364
 because we don't know who
 
 00:56:39.385 --> 00:56:40.706
 we're supposed to be in the new group,
 
 00:56:40.766 --> 00:56:40.865
 right?
 
 00:56:40.885 --> 00:56:42.166
 There's that social anxiety.
 
 00:56:42.507 --> 00:56:43.748
 When I can be seen truly for
 
 00:56:43.768 --> 00:56:44.829
 who I am in a space,
 
 00:56:45.349 --> 00:56:47.050
 It's really nourishing and healing.
 
 00:56:47.431 --> 00:56:48.931
 And that's what I love to do
 
 00:56:48.972 --> 00:56:50.753
 and offer for people in
 
 00:56:50.773 --> 00:56:51.693
 doing readings for them,
 
 00:56:51.813 --> 00:56:52.954
 either if they're just fun
 
 00:56:52.994 --> 00:56:54.295
 or if like deeply connected
 
 00:56:54.335 --> 00:56:55.155
 for supporting them in
 
 00:56:55.175 --> 00:56:56.416
 their journey for empowerment.
 
 00:56:56.817 --> 00:56:58.697
 So I would say if you have
 
 00:56:58.878 --> 00:57:00.458
 any questions about this
 
 00:57:00.498 --> 00:57:01.820
 topic or need any support
 
 00:57:01.880 --> 00:57:04.081
 in your organization, reach out to us.
 
 00:57:04.141 --> 00:57:04.800
 Give me a call.
 
 00:57:04.880 --> 00:57:06.322
 I do free phone
 
 00:57:06.362 --> 00:57:07.422
 consultations because
 
 00:57:07.443 --> 00:57:08.163
 there's nothing more
 
 00:57:08.182 --> 00:57:10.565
 important in this world right now than...
 
 00:57:11.405 --> 00:57:12.385
 Creating safety in our
 
 00:57:12.405 --> 00:57:13.666
 community and connection.
 
 00:57:14.367 --> 00:57:14.967
 We need to take
 
 00:57:15.007 --> 00:57:16.248
 responsibility and look
 
 00:57:16.788 --> 00:57:19.210
 into what we have maybe
 
 00:57:19.449 --> 00:57:20.510
 encountered in the past.
 
 00:57:20.570 --> 00:57:21.891
 What are red flags for us
 
 00:57:22.311 --> 00:57:23.192
 that maybe we don't want to
 
 00:57:23.211 --> 00:57:23.753
 do that again?
 
 00:57:23.793 --> 00:57:25.253
 How can we reevaluate and
 
 00:57:25.293 --> 00:57:26.974
 reestablish what we value now?
 
 00:57:27.335 --> 00:57:28.434
 Maybe it's different so that
 
 00:57:28.454 --> 00:57:29.876
 we can locate groups that
 
 00:57:29.896 --> 00:57:33.398
 will be nourishing for us.
 
 00:57:33.458 --> 00:57:35.800
 And then for the final part
 
 00:57:35.820 --> 00:57:36.880
 of this episode, I'll share...
 
 00:57:38.260 --> 00:57:41.501
 If we are navigating our
 
 00:57:42.181 --> 00:57:43.762
 resistance to entering in
 
 00:57:44.222 --> 00:57:45.643
 to a new space or a new group,
 
 00:57:47.063 --> 00:57:48.364
 first I would say,
 
 00:57:48.463 --> 00:57:49.063
 if you've had bad
 
 00:57:49.103 --> 00:57:50.324
 experiences and are hesitant,
 
 00:57:50.844 --> 00:57:52.405
 first just acknowledge those fears.
 
 00:57:53.344 --> 00:57:54.545
 If we can call out and
 
 00:57:54.585 --> 00:57:55.186
 acknowledge and be
 
 00:57:55.246 --> 00:57:56.025
 self-aware of something
 
 00:57:56.045 --> 00:57:57.487
 we're feeling and label it,
 
 00:57:57.847 --> 00:57:59.047
 it comes up from this depth
 
 00:57:59.086 --> 00:58:00.128
 of the unconscious and
 
 00:58:00.148 --> 00:58:01.407
 we're now actually aware of it.
 
 00:58:01.708 --> 00:58:03.349
 We can be aware of what our body's doing,
 
 00:58:03.369 --> 00:58:04.588
 how our body's feeling in
 
 00:58:04.628 --> 00:58:05.849
 relation to that emotion or
 
 00:58:05.869 --> 00:58:06.650
 that experience.
 
 00:58:07.329 --> 00:58:07.690
 And of course,
 
 00:58:07.730 --> 00:58:09.132
 if we're aware of it and we call it out,
 
 00:58:09.152 --> 00:58:10.072
 we put a label on it,
 
 00:58:10.112 --> 00:58:12.514
 it's much more easy to spot
 
 00:58:13.034 --> 00:58:14.956
 and then use that awareness
 
 00:58:15.056 --> 00:58:18.500
 to eventually move past it.
 
 00:58:18.521 --> 00:58:20.762
 The second thing I'd say, join a group.
 
 00:58:21.706 --> 00:58:23.068
 Just a small gathering maybe
 
 00:58:23.268 --> 00:58:24.809
 once because it doesn't
 
 00:58:24.869 --> 00:58:26.891
 have to be like you go to a
 
 00:58:26.931 --> 00:58:27.572
 group and you have to go
 
 00:58:27.592 --> 00:58:28.293
 there all the time.
 
 00:58:28.552 --> 00:58:29.934
 It doesn't have to be overwhelming.
 
 00:58:29.974 --> 00:58:31.275
 You can start with one event
 
 00:58:31.715 --> 00:58:33.117
 or maybe even one interaction.
 
 00:58:33.157 --> 00:58:35.019
 Maybe join a Facebook online
 
 00:58:35.059 --> 00:58:37.742
 group first to maybe see if
 
 00:58:37.782 --> 00:58:39.083
 they have in-person gatherings,
 
 00:58:39.123 --> 00:58:40.103
 if this is a space or a
 
 00:58:40.143 --> 00:58:40.905
 group of people you want to
 
 00:58:40.925 --> 00:58:41.726
 meet with in person.
 
 00:58:42.900 --> 00:58:45.021
 And then if you are looking
 
 00:58:45.061 --> 00:58:46.563
 to discern spaces,
 
 00:58:47.063 --> 00:58:47.824
 look for some of the
 
 00:58:47.844 --> 00:58:50.445
 trauma-informed principles
 
 00:58:50.465 --> 00:58:51.266
 that I shared earlier in
 
 00:58:51.286 --> 00:58:52.748
 the episode to make sure
 
 00:58:52.768 --> 00:58:54.168
 that you feel valued and respected.
 
 00:58:54.349 --> 00:58:55.509
 And if it's not there,
 
 00:58:55.710 --> 00:58:56.409
 hold your boundaries.
 
 00:58:56.449 --> 00:58:57.811
 If it doesn't feel good to you,
 
 00:58:58.210 --> 00:58:59.711
 you can also reflect with a
 
 00:58:59.751 --> 00:59:00.592
 friend and make sure it's
 
 00:59:00.652 --> 00:59:01.333
 not just your own
 
 00:59:01.373 --> 00:59:02.594
 projections of what you had
 
 00:59:02.614 --> 00:59:03.295
 happen in the past,
 
 00:59:03.355 --> 00:59:05.036
 if you had experiences that were not good,
 
 00:59:05.416 --> 00:59:06.657
 but also just make sure
 
 00:59:06.677 --> 00:59:07.597
 that you hold to what your
 
 00:59:07.637 --> 00:59:08.358
 boundaries are.
 
 00:59:08.378 --> 00:59:09.679
 Because if it doesn't feel right,
 
 00:59:10.099 --> 00:59:11.320
 if you're feeling not safe,
 
 00:59:11.559 --> 00:59:12.740
 and you might want to reevaluate,
 
 00:59:13.541 --> 00:59:14.302
 Because that's going to
 
 00:59:14.322 --> 00:59:16.085
 continue to create resistance.
 
 00:59:16.927 --> 00:59:17.969
 So the final thing I would
 
 00:59:17.989 --> 00:59:20.092
 share with you guys is this
 
 00:59:20.172 --> 00:59:21.833
 whole sense of loneliness,
 
 00:59:21.893 --> 00:59:22.956
 if you're feeling that,
 
 00:59:23.996 --> 00:59:25.278
 if you are someone that
 
 00:59:25.338 --> 00:59:27.061
 doesn't have a lot of these connections,
 
 00:59:27.081 --> 00:59:27.902
 you're looking for them.
 
 00:59:29.103 --> 00:59:29.724
 you're not alone.
 
 00:59:30.184 --> 00:59:32.965
 This is something that is an epidemic.
 
 00:59:33.166 --> 00:59:36.226
 And we have the opportunity
 
 00:59:36.246 --> 00:59:37.608
 to share this episode maybe
 
 00:59:37.628 --> 00:59:38.588
 with others that we know
 
 00:59:38.688 --> 00:59:40.208
 that might be struggling with loneliness.
 
 00:59:40.889 --> 00:59:42.309
 And we have the opportunity
 
 00:59:42.329 --> 00:59:42.730
 just to bring
 
 00:59:42.789 --> 00:59:44.050
 self-awareness to this topic
 
 00:59:44.070 --> 00:59:45.170
 so that we can make choices
 
 00:59:45.210 --> 00:59:46.210
 that support our health.
 
 00:59:46.590 --> 00:59:48.172
 Again, in mind, body, and spirit,
 
 00:59:48.192 --> 00:59:49.172
 because this topic,
 
 00:59:49.532 --> 00:59:50.594
 this epidemic doesn't
 
 00:59:50.634 --> 00:59:51.795
 affect us just mentally.
 
 00:59:52.175 --> 00:59:53.516
 So other than that,
 
 00:59:53.615 --> 00:59:55.516
 thank you so much again for listening.
 
 00:59:55.757 --> 00:59:56.938
 I appreciate you all.
 
 00:59:57.057 --> 00:59:58.719
 And here's to developing and
 
 00:59:58.760 --> 00:59:59.559
 connecting with the
 
 00:59:59.579 --> 01:00:00.621
 community that is in right
 
 01:00:00.681 --> 01:00:02.041
 alignment with you and your
 
 01:00:02.081 --> 01:00:03.163
 values of who you are as a
 
 01:00:03.222 --> 01:00:05.643
 person and what your soul needs as well.
 
 01:00:05.905 --> 01:00:07.806
 So thank you again for listening,
 
 01:00:07.846 --> 01:00:10.588
 my friends, and be well until next time.
 
 01:00:14.315 --> 01:00:15.735
 Thank you for listening to
 
 01:00:15.775 --> 01:00:18.257
 the Mind Body Detox podcast.
 
 01:00:18.657 --> 01:00:20.237
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 01:00:20.518 --> 01:00:21.778
 share it with others and
 
 01:00:21.838 --> 01:00:22.739
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 01:00:23.239 --> 01:00:24.780
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 01:00:24.820 --> 01:00:26.320
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 01:00:26.440 --> 01:00:27.581
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 01:00:29.422 --> 01:00:30.523
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 01:00:31.023 --> 01:00:32.443
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 01:00:32.483 --> 01:00:33.744
 in our show notes to submit
 
 01:00:33.784 --> 01:00:35.045
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 01:00:35.065 --> 01:00:35.746
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